funny

Multi-Track Drifting Live Action

The one true solution to the trolly problem.

DEJA VU

Kill everyone on both tracks?

I want to see the life size version pull off that trick.

A little something I made

A little something I made
Original OP just got a low res version, changed it slightly and claimed it as his own.

Made by Deathbulge

OP just got a low res version, changed it slightly and claimed it as his own.

Made by Deathbulge

Was about to give you shit about claiming someone else's work as your own, then I saw your username.

Scum.

You didn't make this.

When firecrackers are banned but you still want to celebrate

When firecrackers are banned but you still want to celebrate

"Okay, all the balloons are ready for the party!"

"Awesome, I'll go tell Johnny"

"No, Karl stop, it's caught on your bel...... fuck"

Humans!!!! Why are we so smart!!

It sounds like Two Girls, One Cup... But it's actually Two Guys, One Chair. Interesting.

Ohh God.... THAT

Every villain is haunted by the moment that made him the way he is

Larry Bird!!! Damn you! Oh wait... bird... pollo.... I have a plan.

Now this is good.

I thought it was going to be Magic Johnson.

Two types of people who start fights at bars: 1. Chad in his Tapout shirt after downing a few vodka Redbulls. 2. Black dude who just got his Jordans stepped on.

What are you looking at?

A short guide on how to get your hand bitten by a dog.

Classic goofball Boxer reaction. +1 for Boxers.

I have grown up with boxers and not once has one of them ever bitten me while playing. They like to smack with their noses a lot and other stupid shit.

It oddly reminds me of professional boxers at the weigh in when they do those awkward stares and face bumping...

Lesbian couples pregnancy announcement

Lesbian couples pregnancy announcement

I find that two gay guys would be funnier.

“Someone is pregnant but we are not sure who did it.”

TBH if you're lesbians, you are formally required to split the dad jokes amongst yourself. You BOTH are contractually obligated to make dad jokes.

It's right there in the paperwork you submit to become lesbians, right under the non-disclosure agreement concerning leprechauns.

Well, you're born either male or female.

So, no.

Transgender or not, if you're capable of carrying a child, you's a female. Full stop.

Jane & Silent Roberta?

I made this bad boy out of my old coffee table.

I made this bad boy out of my old coffee table.

Let me guess, it cost next to nothing to make this?

But you had to use $10,000 of tools you conveniently already owned.

I don’t know of this is a reference to /sub/diy but that is a strange subreddit. While I admire most of the results there, the enormous, scratch that, ginormous amount of money, planning, and most of all time required to build X seems crazy to me.

I like how you’ve kept the stain of spilled coffee in the wood. It is a nod to the items original state as a “coffee table”.

Agreed. DIY stuff becomes a tad grating when the "yourself" is a professional with tens of thousands of dollars worth of equipment.

What the hell are we drug testing a janitor for?

What the hell are we drug testing a janitor for?

I worked as a janitor for about a year when I first got out of high school. First day on the job my boss says, "So we basically have to get all the dust bunnies from under these racks- hey you smoke weed?" "Uhhh..." "I do, just do your work and don't talk to anybody." He'd run up during the day and go, "let's go, we got stuff to do." And then we'd go smoke weed behind Wendy's. Not my best year, but not my worst year.

Drug tested employees = much lower insurance rates.

The number of people who have negative consequences from a poppyseed muffin is negligible.

The real problem is the invasion of privacy. Drug tests used to only be required when there was a direct threat to public safety, like pilots, bus drivers, garbage men, heavy machine operators etc. This expanded because basically every job has some possibility of causing some amount of harm to someone. Also the war on drugs and ljust say no policies” warped people’s minds.

Not to mention someone can drink a gallon of whiskey the day before and show up to work hungover and debilitated, but smoke a joint 2 weeks prior and you’re somehow an insurance risk. It’s a bullshit system.

If it didn’t the insurance companies wouldn’t do it. Assessing risk is their entire business model. Cost savings from preventing a single lawsuit due to a high person screwing up buys a lot of drug tests.

Netflix Got No Chill!

Netflix Got No Chill!

Nice burn Netflix, about how your selection is obviously only good for background sounds during sex

Netflix got the Emoji movie now. Totally getting laid.

Fucking harsh, Netflix.

Netflix knows its place in this world

Local bar knows their audience

Local bar knows their audience

That's a next morning shit you don't want to catch a glimpse of.

Like Taco Bell and Fruity Pebbles.

No

I know what those words mean, but not in that order.

Try one of these subthreads