I'm the average lesbian feminist, but I still hide the tampon up my sleeve when going to the restroom, even though I know I shouldn't have to.
It's culturally engrained I guess. I found an article about the author, Rupi Kaur, who posted a photo on Instagram of a blood stain on her pants and she got death threats from it.
You shouldn't have to be scared for someone to see a tampon, just like people aren't scared to grab a tissue or a roll of tp.
Yes, nature can be ugly. But no one gets angry if someone says they have to take a piss. No one gets offended at the sight of toilet paper, or refuses to buy it because just touching it is gross.
Having a period is a part of basic biology that happens to women, but is treated like a horrible disgusting act that women do.
It's not pathetic at all. People addressing you the correct way matters. Thanks for sharing your happiness.
I love how your order is literally your username.
If it makes you feel any better I've been a girl all my life and they never get my name right. So now I just say "Vanessa" when they ask because it's hard to fuck up Vanessa.
Are you kidding me? That's awesome! You go, girl!
To the creep: when they talk about rape culture and here you are taking full advantage of the fact it's a real problem for women full well knowing what youre doing: that's the problem.
you're all of the problem.
Not just part of it.
All of it.
The next day on Reddit: "So I just happened to walk by some chick and she called the cops on me." 1000 upvotes 3x gold
God you're so uptight for getting scared in that totally terrifying situation. Women, amirite?
Seriously, fuck that guy. I hate people.
Hmmmm. This kinda gets to me right now. I know its always been important, but don't ever let someone tell you that you're over reacting or its not that serious.
My dad has a coworker who is going through hell right now. He found out that his partner's daughter was murdered over the weekend. We don't know a lot of details aside from it was bad, there was no forced entry, and it appears that she may have been stalked beforehand. I never knew her, but I keep thinking over and over about it. How many things could have happened up until that point? What if she had been scared or worried, but someone said to suck it up or it wasn't that serious? What if someone saw the murderer looming around and just didn't think it was important?
Call the cops. Take pictures. Get near other people to be safe. Don't even let someone tell you to lighten up. Lives could be on the line.
Me vs. the girl you’re currently dating cause even tho I was sad at first I can see that you two make a better couple and I’m happy for you both.
Ugh. This reminds me how awful my ex is, and how no girl should be with him for her sake...
But your post is totally awesome.
This is a nice meme. I like it
People think I'm jealous of my ex's new girlfriend, when really I just really don't like him dating her because unless he's changed a lot he's just a terrible partner and she doesn't seem like she deserves that (not that anyone does, but she seems like a genuinely kind and cool person)
The point should be affirmative, enthusiastic consent. Not even just legally but socially. Why have an acceptable norm where a sexual encounter leaves one person in tears and/or traumatized? Because that benefits one side more than the other to do so? That's not anymore acceptable than other forms of taking advantage that we prohibit.
It's wrong and it's going to change because that's how social progress is made; enough people have enough of a status quo that expenses them disproportionately and harmfully.
Exactly. If it’s not a “hell yes,” it’s a no. If you have to doubt if it’s a yes, it’s a no.
My response is always "yes, you're finally getting it".
It is tough though. Because some of these women, when faced with the realities, come to the realisation that they were assaulted. It happened to me where I had one conversation with a friend and came out of it realising that my original "times I've been assaulted" was far less than the reality. I was a mess for a week and often have to push it to the back of my mind because I still haven't fully dealt with the ideas. So ladies, do remember that sometimes when women say the above that it could just be their minds refusing to acknowledge that they were victims once too.
That's not to say we shouldn't continue to have conversations, just tread lightly when someone says this, because what they could be saying is "that means I've been assaulted, and I don't want to treat myself like a victim right now, so I'm going to be defensive".
Although it is often just women participating in the current patriarchal system.
A big part of not understanding what sexual harassment and assault actually looks like is that there are plenty of women and men who have been victims themselves but aren't traumatized by what happened so they minimize the experiences of others.
Yes, many of your friends may have experienced this, and some may have coped with it, others might be affected. You aren't the gatekeeper that determines how others deal with their life experiences.
I like your boss.
For real tho, there's nothing better than a supportive boss who calls out shitty behavior like that. It's so validating.
It was just amazing - I was internally grumbling when my coworker asked the question, thinking to myself I already told you that and then BAM.
My boss even followed it up with "so what did she tell you? Yes, do that. Good job Lisbethhh!"
Wow! That’s a good boss. A new guy started at my work and is constantly asking me questions and then asking someone else the same question after I answer it correctly. 😒 it’s getting me pretty unmotivated to help him. Last time I just told him to ask someone else instead of taking a proper look at what he was asking.
I know what you mean. Why should I waste my time answering you when I know you're going to ask someone else afterwards anyway?
It's a habit for this coworker too. It was so satisfying.
BUT WHAT ABOUT MONIKA
All I want in life is have my shirt rip during a lifting session because muscles, and not because I bent down too far picking up the chips.
But for real, amazing and go you!!!! Care to share stats? I just recently got over a month long sickness and I'm back to lifting now. Have to start slow and I'm crying. But every little step helps. :D
That's an interesting analogy. I'm pretty sure the only reason I don't have a tattoo is because I just can't decide on a wall color!
Aw I dig it. I also feel like it's a part of making my body my own. I deal with chronic migraine pain and a lot of betrayal at how my body makes me feel, but I can make my body look physically in a way that makes me happy.
I don't have any tattoos but I relate to this - in our society it so feels like women's bodies are considered public property (ie everyone is entitled to have access to them/have the right to sexualize them/use them/they are decorations etc), or they belong to a man or for the government to make decisions about etc....
Also I'm a rape survivor
It often feels like my body doesn't even BELONG to me!!
My therapist suggested that I make a bold but reversible decision with my look to force myself to take more ownership with my body (such as dye my hair a pastel colour), or buy a mirror for my bedroom and look at my body every day till I feel like it's mine.
During college, I managed to buy based on the philosophy of tattoos. It was a decent read but one chapter really impressed me: talking about the intersection of feminism and tattoos. The idea is that historically, females are used for the public's viewing pleasure as a subject. But a tattooed woman breaks this chain by saying, "You will look at this." She cultivates her body and curates how you will view it.
While there are clearly other reasons for tattoos, and many folks have more than one reason, I think that this one sticks with me a bit and extends to how we dress.
The episode is called Moaning Lisa (S.1 Ep 6) and it's the introduction to her chronic depression.
It struck a cord when I first watched it because as a kid, it felt like someone finally understood what I was feeling. I too would get so sad for no reason and I couldn't explain why. This scene in particular is special because I wish I had someone to tell me those words. That it's okay not to be okay sometimes and that people will still love me.
But the whole episode is worth a watch.
I rewatched the first few seasons of Simpsons recently and they are freaking dark. Like, Homer almost commits suicide dark. Simpson's these days are kinda in an upswing in quality but they're mostly just parody. The episodes don't have meaning. I can still get a laugh out of the Simpsons but that loss of depth to the episodes is, to me, why the modern episodes aren't as good.
Seriously. I feel like you could count the entire first season there. I've been watching the series from the beginning today (home sick).
Marge comes close to having a full-blown sexual affair.
Bart was a literal slave in France
Lisa experiences her first depressive episode
Homer almost commits suicide after losing his job
The kids are babysat by a dangerous escaped criminal
Bart spends an episode getting beaten up by a bully
I don't know, but part of me thinks they made it so dark so early to make sure people get this is an adult show? Despite the obvious technical flaws, I think the first season is one of the best. Just watching them set the tone for the rest of the series is so cool.
Yeah for sure. If you look throughout the show, Lisa's storyline is just devastating. Taking into account her depression:
She's had her beloved mentors leave and/or die, she's bullied at home and at school, she has a stalker in Milhouse, she's constantly overlooked either because of Bart's behavioural issues and Maggie being a baby, a father (who no doubt has his moments) that is always dismissing her hobbies and interests in some form, and that she's quite aware of her parents very fragile marriage and will often be the mediator or counsellor to Homer. I know full well it's a show, but she's supposed to be fucking 8 haha.
She was always my least favourite character until I understood just what this poor girl has actually gone through.
Meanwhile it took some of them months before they finally, begrudgingly acknowledged the impropriety of the judge in the Brock Turner case (and others probably haven't acknowledged it at all yet).
And sure, if you talk about Brock Turner on reddit now, the majority of people will chime in to agree that he and his family and his lawyer and the judge are all detestable scumbags, but it was like pulling teeth to get to that point. In a post that was made just after Turner's dad wrote his infamous letter I was STILL seeing exchanges like:
"I just can't agree with punishing someone when it's a he-said she-said thing."
"Uh, he was caught in the act by two eye witnesses who detained him until the police got there."
It was literally the most important piece of evidence in this highly publicized case that had been going on FOR MONTHS by that point, whether Turner had committed the act in question was not being debated by anyone including his lawyer and himself, and yet fucking reddit saw a man getting punished for raping a woman and needed to rear it's dumb reactionary head to spew some garbage about how this is all a pattern of men being victimized.
And even after most of reddit finally got on the right side of the thing and acknowledged that the judge was being a scumbag by repeatedly blaming the victim and defending the rapist during the trial, people continued to say (and still continue to say) that the Turner case is an exception, and that in any case where the rapist was not literally caught in the act by two eye witnesses you can never be sure if the victim is telling the truth or not.
Now this other scumbag is on the hook for abusing 150 girls and women over a span of decades, the judge says one thing that is arguably improper for a judge to say, and the backlash has been instantaneous.
Poor reddit dudebros; they can't call all these women false accusers. They can't say "it was just regret sex". They can't say that the 150 girls "just lead him on". They can't say "they're just in it for the money". They can't say "his life is ruined" because they didn't care about his life to begin with. They can't say "wait for a guilty verdict before saying anything".
So what are they to do? They can't let this pervert molestor simply go to prison for his crimes without finding some woman to throw in the proverbial cell with him. And they're not enraged by his actions so logically a feeeemale judge shouldn't be either. "But she was, and therefore she was biased! Harpy! Unprofessional! Hysterical! Out of control! Seeking attention (the worst crime)!"
Ah, there we go, we've balanced the scales, and now it won't just be men who come out looking like psychopaths in this narrative!
Remember that Nassar is a whiny punk anyway. When Judge Aquilina allowed the victims of his abuse to confront him, he wrote a pathetic little letter :
The onslaught caused Nassar to write Aquilina questioning, “my ability to be able to face witnesses these next four days, mentally.”
“You may find it harsh that you are here listening, but nothing is as harsh as what your victims endured for thousands of hours at your hands collectively,” Aquilina said, staring at Nassar. “You spent thousands of hours perpetrating criminal sexual conduct on minors.
“Spending five or six days listening to them is significantly minor considering the thousands of hours of pleasure you had at their hands, ruining their lives,” Aquilina said.
What is really sad is those in power who KNEW Nassar was abusing athletes did nothing to stop or get rid of him. They should all get the "Joe Paterno" treatment and be forced to resign in disgrace.
And yet still I saw some dumbass ask yesterday is there any proof of what he did to the women?. If 150 spoken victims, and a cache of child porn weren't enough, he plead guilty. The pinnacle of Reddit's ability to accept and accusation of fact, being found in a court of law to be guilt, and still this guy was like "C'mon, did he really do It?"