ScottishPeopleTwitter

Aye.

Aye.

We get Deliveroo to deliver KFC on Sunday morning when we're still buckled.

Did ye aye?

It’s not a reference as far as I’m aware. He’s basically saying “Hungover are you? Did you fuck it by drinking too much? Wish McDonald’s did delivery? Do you? Yeah.”

It’s taking the piss out of every tweeting this shite every Saturday and Sunday morning

Throw a lamp at yer maw

Throw a lamp at yer maw

Real HD screenshot here chief

so scottish that even the image has gone through a chip shop

The firework won’t tear your hair out and never let the story die tho

Relevant xkcd

Renew the membership

Renew the membership

For those that don't know

Ty I thought polo shirts were the Scottish equivalent of flannel for gay signaling or something

It’s a gay club in Scotland.

Anyone able to explain? Reddit hug of death here

Private school weans

Private school weans

Ex private school wean here. The sunday evening chapel in full kilt thing was fucking horrendous. Who the fuck wants to sing hymns in high school? Nobody, not a sausage. Not to mention the compulsory sport participation, the snobbery, the complete lack of guidance for anyone who doesn't want to go to university...yeah lots of dark little corners in private schools.

I'm sure grammar school kids had it rough but I'm pretty sure their seniors didn't make them run over pin tacks barefoot for fun.

"Nobody, not a sausage."

Carry your own equipment? Isn't that what the hoi polloi are for?

I used to work at a riding school and we had a lot of private school kids around. They used to come to the yard straight from school in their ankle length skirts and boaters and get changed in the loo. My god they were snotty little brats. I caught one of the primary school ones slapping her pony round the face once and yelled at her - I don't think she was used to being told off, she burst into tears and ran off to tell her au pair.

Pull/Push doors suck

Pull/Push doors suck
Pull/Push doors suck

Did you just reposted the “top of all time” post?

General reposti!

Wow. Never seen that one before.

Margaret votes Tory

Margaret votes Tory

"too young/uninformed to tae vote"

But not too young or uninformed to get married, or to make life changing career decisions. :thinking:

I'm gonna play devil's advocate here but getting married and making life changing decisions affects your own life whereas voting affects everyone in the country.

I think that students should be taught about the political system. Can't complain about them being "uninformed" then make no efforts to inform them. Even as a 19 year old I feel horribly uninformed and don't know where to look to find out more.

In response to that, though...

Yeah, voting affects everyone in the country, including the 16 year olds. It affects them for longer than everyone else, in fact.

And if we are worried about choices that affect "everyone" being so extra-important that we can't let everyone be responsible for it, maybe there should be an IQ requirement too so that stupid people don't screw it up for the rest of us? :D

If you old enough to join the army and pay tax, your old enough to vote.

Scotrail tackling goths

Scotrail tackling goths

Scots have this weird thing of calling anyone alternative who wears black a goth. So monster is mostly drunk by people who work in cex or like bring me the horizon, and so monster becomes associated with goths.

A good example is how monster have sponsored warped tour and slam dunk for a while, Scottish people would call all the people at those festivals goths.

DUDES the train conductor just told a guy with a can of monster he can't drink that on here before 10 hahahaha, Scotrail are anti-goth pass it on

Is monster a goth thing?

And yet they have a million ways to call someone a moron

Fer keeping me backside safe on th' roooad

Fer keeping me backside safe on th' roooad

This is how Groundskeeper Willy talks

What the fuck kinda accent is that supposed to be?..

Get tae fuck wi that shitey accent, ya fuckin bellend

Some Scottish accent that's typed in..

Just took a wee stroke

Just took a wee stroke

I like saying down in a Scottish accent

Sitting in the local hospital waiting room, listening in on conversations:

"Did you just get done getting weighed?"

"Yes, I am five feet and one inch tall, I've lost an inch (probably from their waist) since last month. What are you in here for?"

"Just had a small stroke."

"You're looking well all things considered."

Tweet at bottom:

"Yes im about to go to the Veterinarian, they're going to put me to sleep".

Ya stupid wee dick x

For most things we use metric but for height and some other stuff we use imperial for some reason.

Ignorant American question here:

Scottish use the Imperial system?

The true North!

The true North!

"All you lot from south of the wall, you're southerners."

Nah, but we all think it though. It's just a fun wee jibe by Limmy.

LISTEN HERE BASTARD

Personally I think they should relocate the wall to around the bottom of Sunderland and let all us northerners become Scotland’s new Southerners.

Try one of these subthreads