My wife and I were the only ones dancing and singing along with "I can make your hands clap" while our children aggressively rolled their eyes at us

My wife and I were the only ones dancing and singing along with "I can make your hands clap" while our children aggressively rolled their eyes at us

Embarrassing your kids is part of the job. I always tell my daughter there is no way I could ever embarrass her as much as my dad did me. And I couldn't, even if that was my sole goal in life. She never knew my dad :/

The best part about becoming an adult is when you hit that point of not giving a shit if you are considered cool or popular. So liberating.

Honestly, I think it's a good thing that kids suddenly develop awareness of the perceptions of others. An adult stops caring about others think? Great, they dance more, laugh more, have more for fun etc. A kid that doesn't care about what others think? Terrible, they don't shower, interrupt others, don't brush their teeth, blow their noses on things they shouldn't etc. It's not a great system, but I feel like savagery of middle school is an important part in turning a kid into someone that doesn't live in a van down by the river living off of government cheese.

I did that right about the time my son entered middle school. I told him, "Unfortunately for you, I'm hitting the age where I don't care what people think just as you start to care desperately what people think." We got through it with no major incidents, though.

You end up realizing though that embarrassing parents are the best ones. My dad came to my high school graduation in a shirt with with naked ladies printed on it.

All my friends loved it hahaha

My mom would slowly cruise by student pick up, roll down her window and ask [Brooklyn accent]: "lookin' for a good tiiiime" with a shit-eating grin on her face.

I was broken in long before that and I was 13 when the above occurred.

My daughter was a little too demanding about wanting a ride home from a track meet.

And that is why I, a forty-something Midwest-raised white guy, pulled up to her school

With my cap turned sideways And my seat reclined Arm draped over the steering wheel Blaring "Straight Outta Compton" at painful levels With the minivan's side door open for maximum music sharing enjoyment

Her friends liked that a lot more than she did. Future requests from her were much more polite.

I wish there were a way to really get kids to understand this feeling. I was far too stressed as a child.

Somewhere in the gajillion things I read and watch, someone once said, and I have no idea if it's true, when people are on their deathbeds, they often wish they had danced more.

That's my Pascal's Wager. Dance, it's better than regretting having not danced when the blackness comes.

Your children are wrong.

Depends on the embarrassment. My dad used to show up to my high school basketball games drunk and yell at the refs and shout "coaching advice" to me when I was playing. Mortifying

Were your arms broken too?

You can dance if you want to

I kind of agree. Kids are still learning how to human so it gives them a good few parameters to get used to in life.

Things are incredibly apparent to us are not apparent to them because we've had a lot more experience being human.

If you're talking about the Fitz + the Tantrums song, hell yeh, that's a good song. The kids are wrong.

You have to embarrass them by dancing to a bunch of super wholesome crap. That's how we breed a new generation of angsty teenagers who will create good music.

I want to be you when I get kids

You can leave your kids behind.

I wish it was funnier but what I did was wander around the crowd during a school football game yelling out my kid's full name until I found him. I had told him we were doing something after school and he wasn't allowed to stay and watch the game with his friends. Well, he ignored me and did it anyway. I had people on the field, sidelines and teachers staring at me until I saw him with a bunch of girls and a couple of his guy friends and shouted "Ah, there's my boy!" and pointed to him. I gave him a break and motioned him to the car instead of going up to them. Boy was he embarrassed. I told him the next time I was going to talk to his friends.

I always heard the lyrics as "I can make that ass clap". I was mortified when the kids at my job were gonna sing this song, but instantly relieved to find out I was actually wrong lol

Embarrassing parents you can look back on and laugh. Parents that habitually embarrass you can go to hell.

The day after Trump was elected my favorite Facebook post was someone saying, "Well, at least punk music is about to get a whole lot better again."

When my kids were in their teens, this was my threat to them to behave themselves. I told them that if they didn't want a concerted effort on my part to embarrass the shit out of them, then they best not put me in the position to do so. They laughed at first but when I followed through one time at my kid's high school, they knew I was serious. It worked pretty well actually.

That was my entire childhood sports experience. Good ol' drunk dad being an ass.

'Cause your kids don't dance, and if they don't dance, then they're no kids of mine...

Actually, even if your kids do dance, they are no kids of mine. I don't have kids.

Depends on the person, what's happening and how often it's happening. Teasing's once in a while isn't so bad, but if you're driving your kid to tears each time, maybe they're not sensitive, you just need to back off.

Hitting 30ish is like turning on easy mode. I wore cookie monster pajamas to the grocery store the other day, it's wonderful.

But the faps are dank

My everyday tshirt ahahah

It's a fine line to dance. You want to demonstrate to your kids that they shouldn't care too much about what others think of them because the adolescent world they occupy doesn't reflect the real world very well. On the other hand you also need to remember that this shit is really big to them and displaying a complete lack of empathy just because you're past that stage can more than offset the lesson you're trying to teach them about not giving a fuck.

Teasing is not part of what I would call being an embarrassing parent. That's the equivalent of "It was just a prank, bro. Get over it." Being an embarrassing parent is, IMO, just being yourself and not caring what your kids or their friends think. For instance, my dad showed up to every Halloween party at my school, K-12, wearing the same pig mask every year. As a little kid, I loved it. When I got into middle school and early high school, it was mortifying seeing him walk in the door with that gross, matted hair mask an oinking at me and my friends. Late high school, it was still embarrassing, but I didn't try to hide, or catch him before he walked in and beg him not to do it. After high school, I had people come up to me and tell me how awesome it was that I had a dad who cared about me that much to visit and embarrass me. Now, in my thirties, just writing this, I get teary eyed thinking about it and how much I'm going to miss him when he's gone.

My friend's middle name is Stevenson. His dad's name is Steven. Therefore my friend is literally a living dad joke.

Oh no... the memories.

Plus puberty is a total bitch..

I feel like people who say this weren't picked on as badly. I understand your point but kids can be ruthless, and not just about being unhygienic or whatever. You would be mercilessly picked on for the silliest things, even positive things like having good grades. That's not healthy to me. I remember middle school being super homophobic, it's hard to get over the psychological effects of that even as an adult.

That still makes me angry almost 3 years later.

They harassed him until they made him cry and then when people told them to stop, said that it was proof of rampant misogyny that they weren't being allowed to harass a man to tears in peace.

That's the exact kind of "Cry Wolf" public shaming bullshit that gave so much of America 'Shame-Burnout' and made them proud to vote for a guy who bragged about sexually assaulting women.

I think younger kids can't distinguish between these things, so to some extent they are the same to a middle-schooler.

That dance wasn't as safe as they said it was.

The dream is in your hands. The key insight is that I care a whole lot less about what middle school kids think of me than I did when I was one.

It's everyday bro with that naked lady flow

Ugh, I like that song well enough, but I hate that it's Fitz and the Tantrums. It's too far out of their normal style for me to handle.

I'm going to drop my kids off at high school in boxer shorts, mismatched sandals and will spread mustard stains over a carefully prepared wife beater.

Then will proceed to cry loudly and hug and kiss my then grown up boys while hank Williams is blaring in my rented pickup truck.

All in retaliation to having a screaming brat in timeout face first in the outside window of the grocery store I still had to go shopping in cause groceries needed, my turn with kid brat being brat.


"im being arrested?"


My 11 year old and I sing "I can smell your butt crack". I may be a bad influence on my kid.

A friend of mine put it as follows: "Twenty-nine is ass. For a whole year you're practically thirty and you feel this sense of dread over it. Then you hit it. Thirty... Thirty... It even sounds better. Plus you get to put all of that silly early twenties shit completely behind you and realize that it just is better."

Oh that's perfect. I always tell my kids that if I ever have to come find them from somewhere I've not given permission to be they are going to be so embarrassed too. I'm gonna roll up in my loud old ass work truck. With my pjs and face mask and slippers. I'm going to bring my big dumb dog with me if acceptaple, I live in the country, this is acceptable 99% of places, and let him love all over their friends. I'm gonna wave and talk to every one, I'm really friendly. I have a feeling it will only happen once.

Your mom sounds like fun. Is she seeing anybody?

Can confirm. Puberty faps were 420bl🔥🔥🔥zeit dank

At certain ages there is nothing a parent can do that is not considered embarrassing.

I'm going to need the back story, please.

My 29th birthday is in a few weeks, so thank you for this


They were probably rolling their eyes cause that song sucks.

My dad used to work in the yard in just a pair of gym shorts. It was a small rural Louisiana community and at one time or another, he had mooned just about everyone. I was in high school at the time.

When he and my mother first married she purchased a pair of shorts for him to do yard work in. It was the next year before he would wear them outside. For some time, he would run behind the house when he heard a car coming. At the time, I guess it just wasn't cool.

Fast forward 25 years and he can keep them pulled up anymore. I now realize now that you can lose a whole bunch of give a fuck in 25 years. I am now at the point where I could happily show my ass to passers by, but unfortunately live in a place where I'd be promptly arrested. My kids are missing out.

Not everybody likes to dance. It's like telling someone to sing.

Geez, this made me realize. I'm finally getting to the age where I need to stop taking my parents for granted.

I know that sound stupid, but kids are often stupid. I'm almost finished college and my Dad is nearing 60. I gotta start being a lot smarter about how we spend time, and getting as much of them as I can on picture and video before they're not even healthy enough to go out anymore.

I think that really is the main reason Trump got in. People got sick of the ridiculous over the top PC bull, let the world burn.

...I think that was wrong but that's the reason IMO.

bernie 2020 please

The other Matt Taylor ...

You also only really remember the 5-10 assholes out of your entire class. My graduating class had 750 kids, only a hand full were actually douchebags. The rest were nice, though it's almost guaranteed that you yourself were an asshole to some group. Calling the jocks dumb, the cheerleaders sluts, goth kids freaks... Whatever it was nearly every kid had some group they disliked but they didn't actually know anyone in those groups.

Totally agree. When Moneygrabber came out, I was jacked for this new band blending a little Motown into their sound. But, Handclap is just pop garbage completely devoid of soul.

Super disappointing turn for a talented band.

Who then kill themselves by 27.

Your e's are swollen

Make new kids who appreciate your awesomeness.

Better than hands clap... only a square would say that

not giving a shit if you are considered cool or popular. So liberating.

It's usually when you figure out the only people that matter are the ones who love you for who you are.

There is a difference between what I am talking about and what you are talking about cus any adult that doesnt shower or do basic hygiene stuff is still gross, not just uncool.

I have no idea what "i can make your hands clap" is.

Am I That out of touch I'm neither a cool kid or embarrassing parent?

everything okay at home, Fox?

It's a rip off of a Chuck e cheese song.


Well you think Pretty Little Liars is a good show so I wouldn't pass judgement.

My kids refuse to headbang along to Bohemian Rhapsody. It IS the kids who are wrong indeed!

Hey I posted something like that! Glad we all have some similar realizations.

Do I need a minivan? Or can I use this old white panel van I use for....stuff.

You can be well educated, edit screen plays and still be /sub/trashy

He was a very well educated guy who edited screenplays. He was just the type of dad to be cheeky and try to embarrass me.

Unfortunately for you, I'm hitting the age where I don't care what people think just as you start to care desperately what people think.

"Welp, anyways, good luck in there!"

I totally feel you, it's just unfortunate that we can't help these little ones through the shittiest period of their lives. I think it's necessary growing pains, but it still suuuuuuucks.

Don't even wait for your own kids! Just do the same thing with anyone's kids, you'll be fine!

Yeah, as a parent of a middle schooler I feel like kids that age either fall into 2 categories.. being the ones who do the bullying or the ones who are bullied. You either go along with the cool kids and hope they accept you or end up on the butt end of criticism constantly. My daughter falls into the latter group.. she just wants to have fun and be silly and still do "kid" things but since middle school there's so much pressure to act grown up and be fashionable, wear makeup, dye your hair, listen to the right music, be active on social media..and it hit her all at once that she's been really in the middle of both worlds for a while now. It's a tough age and it sucks they have to go through it honestly and I don't feel it should have to be that way to grow up

My 16 year old step-daughter and her friends were all about dabbing. Then i did it one time in front of them and it stopped.


Yeah. Internet signal keeps going in and out but it's not a big deal.

Is your dad Matt Taylor?

I didn't cry about it. I just recognized that my mother didn't see me as a real person based on considering it fun to make me uncomfortable, and I coloured my opinion of her accordingly.

I never dance at concerts. I just stand and nod. It's not that I want to dance but am self-conscious, it's that I don't want to dance. If you want to dance, do it. If other people don't, then they won't. Relax.

And also not giving a crap if randos think a single thing at all about you.

How do you think they ended up with kids?

Or heroin.

I feel like I'm missing an important piece of data. Where did this happen? There's a big difference between wedding and department store.


Yeah but does your dad respact the wahmen?

That's literally what the singer is talking about tho so you weren't far off

My mom embarrassed the hell out of me but looking back she was cool af. I remember in third grade I was in the library with my class and she came bursting through the doors dressed as a witch (it was Halloween). She was on a broomstick and was running around evilly laughing and pointing at little kids saying "I'll get you my pretty" like the witch from wizard of oz.

Listen to MoneyGrabber and Don't gotta work it out. Those are their best two songs Imo. Unfortunately, each subsequent album had digressed further away from that sound.

Embarrassing your kid about certain things when they are young can really fuck them up for the rest of their life. Especially things of a sexual nature.

I live with them. Not to sound rude, but I already have plenty of experiences with being near them. My concern is, I don't have a very good visual memory, and I don't have a lot of pictures or video of my dad laughing or talking or the usually funny stuff he does.


I'm not disagreeing with that. If you think your parents are embarrassing because they want to give you a hug or little shit like that you need to relax.

If you're at a point where your kid is afraid to do something like sing around you because they know you'll torture them about it then no, that situation could probably be handled better.

That's hilarious.

No, the music and dancing has nothing to do with this. Saddling them with debt they'll never be able to pay because we killed the economy and ruined social security is how you achieve this goal.

They haunt us.

That was three years ago?! Holy moly, time goes fast, and I too am still livid.

SJW's fight for the right for women to wear whatever they want. However, there is cognitive dissonance when those same SJW's scream at a man because of what he's wearing....

If women are allowed to wear whatever they want, shouldn't a man be allowed to wear a shirt with fictional women wearing whatever they want?

I liked it before every talent show that has ever existed started using it. Seriously, if you ever want to ruin a song for someone, just start using it nonstop in advertisements and television show intros.

You waited til 30?

Fuck the pics and video. Really spend the time. Ask em questions you won't ever get an answer to when they're gone.

Have fun with them and throw away the phone.