Tumblr tumblr

me irl

me irl

And then while you're trying to fall asleep 5 years later you remember it and die

die

lel i wish

My problem is that I make a tiny mistake that only has very minor, hardly noticeable repercussions, except I make 87 of them a day.

No, just totally incompetent at basic, everyday life.

Biker gang

Biker gang

You know I think a gang of Hagrids would be a Haggle.

I'm pretty sure she lives next to a leather daddy bar.

A haggle of Hagrids. I approve

I don't know anything about bikes, but surely a ponytail that long can't be safe?

Why you should adopt black cats

Why you should adopt black cats

Black cats really get adopted less? People are weird.

Superstition is powerful stuff. If there's even a remote chance having a dark colored cat would curse you why risk it, right?

Also, they are fancy

The black dogs and cats are the least adopted and the ones to be put down first. People won't adopt black dogs because they are "scary" looking which is ignorance at its finest and black cats due to superstition which is also ignorance at its finest. I adopt black animals due to the stupidity of why others won't.

Advertisement

Potatoes

Potatoes

Have you never had mashed potatoes with the skin? I think it's 34.7% more delicious.

Boil em, mash em, stick em in a stew.

You can't live on normal mashed potatoes because you also have to eat the skin. Also I think it has to be whole milk?

So that girl on TV who only ate cheesy potatoes for 30 years was actually completely healthy? Wow

Oh Canada!

Oh Canada!

The extreme difference another map projection makes always impresses me.

Globes should be much more wide spread.

The gif from the post

Remind me again why this is important before I invest in a bunch of globes that never update.

Not very important in daily life, but every flat map projection will always warp the Dimensions in some way. You have to decide to Keep distances, Areas, angles or whatever else intact, and even then it's difficult.

Digital maps, at least those on Windows, seem to have switched to using a globe internally by now as well.

Petty

Petty

Isn't that a crime?

If you're going to burn a bridge might as well blow it up I guess...smh

Yes. Yes it is.

People always say "don't ever burn a bridge", and while I agree somewhat. I think this piece of advice has been misused too much. I say if you had a terrible experience at a job. And you know you would never work for that person ever again. Then light that shit up.

Facial Hair

Facial Hair

I pull out some hairs from my beard absent-mindedly sometimes, but that's about it.

I'm in my third year at college and I still can't really grow any facial hair. It's either I shave and look baby faced, or I walk around with a very thin pedo-stache and pubes under my chin.

Ehhh I'd choose the baby face.

Also throat cancer so you can have that manly rugged voice.

Roses are red...

Roses are red...

A poem titled "Actually" by P. Ed Antic.

Ah yes. The wine dark sea. And it's friend: rosy fingered dawn. Surely homer could have figured out another way of describing it. I don't miss studying the oddessy.

"Akshually."

This is what I remember from the Radiolab podcast on color. At that time, the Greeks had not started to see or write about blue as a color. Throughout civilization, everyone would notice color for the first time in the same order. Red always comes first. Blue is last or nearly last.

Anaesthetic

Anaesthetic

Toy Story memes are underutilized

normalfagged

Wow... I never thought I could seen a word that combined homophobia and meme gate keeping. lmao. WOW.

Memes are communist by nature. They belong to everyone and no one.

Memes... memes everywhere

Patient: why is that syringe filled with stormy oceans, peacocks fighting and Somalian pirates?

Me, a doctor: anaesthetic

Sugar Auntie

Sugar Auntie

There is literally a simpsons episode like that where bart pimps himself our as a grandchild for old women in exchange for money

Simpsons did it!

I knew an old lady like this. All of my grandmothers and 3 of my great grandmothers were alive and spoiled me often, but this elderly woman down the road sort of adopted me anyway since I always stopped by to talk to her and water her flowers after school. She'd bake me treats, get me a hot wheels car, money for ice cream, things like that. I really miss that old lady, she even made sure her daughter gave me a blanket she made for me when she passed.

Would be lovely. I have a dentist appointment in 12 hours, first one I've had in 11 years because my wisdom teeth are causing me pain. Can't get to it because I can't afford the fucking transit.

Try one of these subthreads