Today I am 9000 days sober.
Sobriety date 25 May 1993.
I drank for 17 years. The last 3 years of that I desperately tried to stop, but failed and failed and failed. I lost everything - wife, family, all friends, two houses, job, career, health, hope.
The good news is that most people who seek help to stop drinking can and do stop (eventually).
I got help from the alcoholics in AA.
Today life is full of family, friends, integrity, compassion, love and joy.
What an accomplishment! Congratulations!! Just for perspective that is 1000x longer than I have been sober.
The first 7 to 10 days are withdrawal and detoxing so they can be very difficult physically.
So 9 days is an accomplishment! I hope that this is the last time you are ever just 9 days sober. 😁
I won't have a drink with you today.
On the off-chance you are a fan, here’s some Dragonball Z-themed celebration: Tomorrow, you will be OVER 9000!
Very well done. :)
I really needed to see this today! I got sober 6 years ago but had a small relapse a couple months ago and for some reason this week has been extra hard. I can do this. Thank you.
Six months since I put that wine witch in her place! So much has changed and a lot hasn’t. Life is still life; I still have days I don’t like my job, my 5 yo still whines, the laundry is still never ending, etc., but I am so much better equipped to handle it ALL!
I do NOT miss: The shame, isolation, exhaustion, wasted days, wasted money, and sadness. The constant booze chatter, the bargaining, or those 15 lbs. The embarrassment of my recycling bin or how familiar I was with the clerk at the liquor store. The sick stomach, fuzzy head and all the crap I ate to try to “fix it”. I do NOT miss the taste of Tums! Or that “next day” taste for that matter. I do NOT miss the planning, plotting, scheduling or the deals I would make with myself. The crushing disappointment and self loathing when I’d cave yet again.
I’m so very grateful to have made it out of that hole! IWNDWYT!
LinMcrae, I wanna be you in 6 months time. You are an inspiration! Thank you. I will join you in not drinking today.
Stick around. Read the stories. Cheer when a person triumphs. Help them back up if they fall.
But most of all believe in yourself and trust that you too can be a version of you without alcohol.
The OP made it 6 months, which is a Triumph! Well worth sharing here.
You? Make it just one day. The next day wake up and focus on how much better you feel. Physically and Emotionally. Take that good feeling and double down on not drinking again this next day.
Chain those single days together and soon it’ll be a week. Then even longer!
If you fail it’s okay. You’re re-wiring your yourself and your life to be free from alcohol. It’s not a switch you can flip, but instead it’s a process of unlearning the bad and relearning the good.
The point to focus on is that you’re trying to be a better version of you, and you’re so absolutely worth it! So you always keep trying. Always.
You’ve taken the first step by admitting that alcohol is a problem. Your journey will be uniquely yours, but here you’re never alone, and you will find the love and support you need to become the alcohol-free version of you that you desire to become.
You are an inspiration Redpizza, the early days are so hard! Keep going!!!
You can be, the answer is in your user name!
Day 5 - Yes. This feels good
Starting Day 5 without alcohol. Yesterday - I felt close to sharing a drink with my kids at dinner. I did not though. Just drank seltzer instead. The strange thing is that I wake up every morning these last few days and think that I should feel regret because once again I had had more alcohol that I intended to but then realize that there is no need for regret -I did not drink yesterday :). Thank you for not drinking with me today. I did not expect posting in this group to help me as much as it has. But it is so helpful. Thank you.
The phantom regret. Felt it too. old habits..
Well done! Posting here helps me tremendously as well.
5th day; going good! Maybe get a badge/day counter? I know it may seem silly but besides a handy counter it becomes its own gamification motivation.
This group is very helpful at not drinking, as is the book "This Naked Mind"; both have helped me tremendously.
I'm not drinking with you today
It's a game changer.
Wrapping up day 3 here. It gets easier, they say. Keep going! IWNDWYT
Congrats, keep strong mate
You got this! I will not drink with you today.
50 reasons why I stopped drinking
Recently, I decided that if I could come up with 50 reasons to stop drinking, then there really was no excuse not to do it.It takes me feel shit the next day It make me feel sick It makes me tremble inside It makes me feel tired It gives me a headache It gives me a fuzzy head It makes my neck hurt It makes me anxious It makes me hate myself It gives me body anxiety It makes me paranoid It makes me feel guilty It makes me feel like a bad person It makes me feel unhealthy It makes my skin looks shit It makes my skin feel shit Can’t drive the next day I fear giving it up It detracts from my health goals It’s wasted calories It’s expensive It’s a waste of money When I have one, I can’t stop Every time I’ve drunk this year I’ve said I want to stop drinking FOREVER It makes me bite my nails I don’t even enjoy it I’ve stopped liking the taste I gives me acid reflux It makes me act stupidly It makes me respond to thing on social media that I shouldn’t It makes me sleep badly t makes me hot in the night It makes me wake early It makes me worry I make me feel like I’m a bad example to other people It takes my energy I like feeling healthy I like to feel fit I like to feel focused I like to be able to concentrate I like to sleep well I like to exercise I want to reach my fitness goals I like to wake up feeling refreshed I like to have energy I need to feel focused and strong in 2018 I want to succeed It’s a drug I don’t need I don’t want to drink any more I don’t want to have to do what others want
Edit: Bonus 51. It makes me forget some hours everyday (and regret the drunk ones I do remember)
I am back to day 4. And will not drink with you today. :)
Right there with you. Alcoholism is an elevator going down. You can decide what floor to get off at.
What a great list! I can relate to almost everything on it. Oh #30 especially. Late night wine-induced ranting about politics on Facebook in particular. Luckily, most of my friends and family are political, but OMG the number of mornings I've woken up feeling horrified I may have gone too far and felt anxious and upset until I could get on FB and check my activity.... gack. never want to go there again. I will not drink with you today, for all of your reasons and my own too :)
I will not drink with you today! We have 50 reasons!
What a great quote!! Totally using IRL!
I did it! I did not drink in 24hrs for the first time in YEARS! Feels so good :-)
Fucking fantastic work, dude!! Never forget how you feel in this exact moment. Not drinking is tough and it gets harder before it gets easier. But if you hold this moment in your memory, you’ll push through. Amazing job!!
If you want to really blow your mind, don't drink for a month. If you have the experience I had, you will not believe how much better you feel.
Why the hell did I allow myself to feel so bad for so long?
24 hours for me too! :) have my fridge stocked with fizzy water to drink with dinner...Spaghetti bolognese tonight which just cries out for red wine..i hide behind pairing food with wine and use it as an excuse to open a bottle in the evenings. Today i will not drink with you all :)
Thank you!!! I’m just buzzing with happiness :-) I’ve got a stash of sweeties in to curb my sugar cravings, and have got all our board games out to play in the evenings. I’d just LOVE a badge as I’m soooo proud of myself 😃 Can’t believe I did it!
There's been plenty of badge sets and resets today...
...and it's been an absolute privilege to do them all.
Welcome to SD!
I will not drink with you today.
Thank you to you and all the mods for making this place so special!
Cheers dude. Good to be back home
Starting over today after a slip - and this place makes that so much easier. Thanks to all involved - Happy New Year!
Seriously, what a valuable set of people we have to help us. Endlessly thankful
The grossest, worst hangover ever.
So, I have stopped. I spent a night two weeks ago drinking everything I could, it was “fun” while it lasted but when I woke up projectile everything from each end I knew I had hit rock bottom. I could barely crawl, I couldn’t see and I made a hell of a mess in the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror, at my bloated face and grey skin and told myself it had to end. I probably drank to excess 4-6 nights a week at some points so this won’t be easy but I’m also getting older and I have to do this for myself. I want to feel better, sleep better, lose weight and generally be happy. Alcohol gave me that quick burst but as you all know, it doesn’t last. I would like to feel genuine happiness one day and I know I must give up to achieve this. I just discovered this group via an article in The Guardian so decided I needed to talk and hear others. Hope you all are well as can be and a fighting sober new year to those who seek it.
Congratulations and best of luck! I'm new here too. I'm 8 weeks ahead of you - to give you a preview of what may be ahead: I just had a great night's sleep (sleep like a beast now!!), bloat gone - lost 10 pounds without trying and it's still dropping every couple days, skin looks good, and my ability to focus and retain info is so much better. But more than that: I just feel so different. Absolutely better, a 100 times better, yes, healthier, a little more pride, a little happier, but more than that - just different.. I can't describe it, other than clarity (which can make me a little sad sometimes, but it's ok - it's life and I can take it as it is!!), and I'm reading that this is only the beginning; all will continue to improve.
My only issue with this article is its promoting moderate drinking. For me, that's just a no go. Besides, I think I'd find it more stressful sticking to one or two than 0.
I drank daily, a lot, for over 20 years before stopping late in 2017 and you are correct about feeling better. I have a bunch of posts here about how amazed I was at how great I felt after a month or so of not drinking.
The first few weeks or a month sucked due to the cravings and the mind games dealing with deprivation - why can't I drink when everyone else can? that bullshit. It's all bullshit that your brain pumps out trying to get you to satisfy your drinking habit.
You'll live without drinking. For me it wasn't one day at a time, it was one decision at a time. Should I turn into the liquor store, should I crack that bottle of wine that my sister gave me for my last birthday, all these micro decisions were tough but after a few weeks it gets easier. You have to tough it out initially - just do it.
Not drinking, now for about 4 months, has been fantastic. No shame looking into my son's eyes while holding a glass in my hand, no guilt for drinking at lunch - or having a quick hair of the dog at 10am, nope, feeling clear and better able to deal with the shitstorm I created during the last year of my heavy drinking.
I'm no expert (by far) but I definitely have perspective about drinking and I think that if a person is thinking that they want to or should quit drinking - they probably should.
Good luck!! Participate in this sub, comment on people's posts even if to say "good luck" or 'congrats" Participating here helped me keep my head in the game and helped me to REMEMBER that I wanted to not drink.
Happy new year!!
After being sick for hours againI have also decided to quit.
Sobriety is awesome
I celebrated the New Year with my family and some guests tonight. My dad and sister drink like I used to - it's a central part of their lives and, once they have three glasses, they keep going and going. My mom is a light drinker.
All three gave me a hard time for not drinking. My mom pretended like she'd never heard about my sobriety before tonight (look at my post history, this is her normal act). My sister pressured me to have a glass of champagne at least.
There was lots of wine and a guest brought good whiskey. My dad was a total mess and yet kept on drinking. I was embarrassed for him that his friends saw him that way. He finally stopped when I poured him water and gave him a look. My sister held it together but was hammered.
They both crashed as soon as the guests left. My mom and I cleaned up everything.
If I'd had anything to drink tonight, I would've ended up like my dad and sister. I can have one glass, or maybe two, and control myself, but once I'm beyond that I lose control. I'm so grateful to have realized this about myself last year.
There is nothing like the high of ending a night sober. Happy new year everyone. I think we're going to have a great 2018. IWNDWYT
There's nothing like being able to clean up after a party sober, versus doing it the next morning with a hangover. Wishing you all the best in your sober journey in 2018!
Go you!!! Family sometimes are the worst for noticing changes in us because they don’t look hard, they just assume you’ll always be the same. I hope one day they do notice and are nicer about it, but if they don’t don’t feel bad, it’s about them and not you. You’re strong and thinking about yourself and that is really important.
I will not drink with you today.
Good job! The pressure to drink from your family must have made things tough, but well done for staying sober. I am similar to you as once I start drinking I can’t stop. Currently nursing cuts and a bump on my head from my last blackout, which started with me going out for “one or two”. It is nice to start the year without a hangover. I will not drink with you today :)
Last night I was asked if I liked to drink
I just started a new job and was at our company Christmas/NY party. This other woman who I work with asked me if I like drinking. It was the first time in my three months of sobriety that I had been asked that. At first I wasn't sure what to say. However, I gave the simple reply of "I don't drink." It felt weird having that come out of my mouth, but it was a good weird feeling. She pressed a little harder and asked about beer. To which I replied the same. At that point I wasn't sure what she was going to do but she turned to my bf who was with me and said to him "You found a girl with a good head on her shoulders." I was a little surprised but I think it was a good first interaction when it comes to being asked about drinking.
I remember the first time I said that. I was being screened by the pre-op nurse. She smiled and then said well I guess I can check off no for drugs and tobacco, also. I smiled back and said, yes you can, thank God.
I was recently thinking about applying for a new job and thought about how nice it would be to be able to start fresh and just be known as someone that doesn’t drink, rather than the girl who is always last to leave the Christmas Party... I didn’t end up applying, but it would be nice...
I’m so thankful I work in a fairly non-drinking culture (cancer care, though I’m non-clinical.) Our work parties usually involve food in the break room, all during work hours. That’s fine with me! This year, my work holiday party happened on Thurs afternoon at my boss’s house- snacks, gift exchange, and party games. It was great. On the rare occasions we do have wine at a party, the non-drinkers always outweigh the drinkers. Seeing the reality of cancer day in and day out will do that to you. :) Good job embracing your new identity! :)
I recently told a friend of mine who was visiting from out of town that I have stopped drinking. He replied "Right on! So you're just drinking beer now or what?" I genuinely thought that was hilarious, but he was being totally sincere. "No", I told him with a smirk, "I stopped drinking anything with alcohol in it." I will not drink with you today!