ihavesex

What? It came up organically

What? It came up organically
Press X to Doubt 

Both parts of his sentence

Press X to

Both parts of his sentence

user name ends in 69. You all should be ashamed of doubting him.

Doubt overload

Damn it u caught me

Damn it u caught me

That’s one elaborate scheme

Image Transcription: Facebook

Facebook User 1

[Image of the following text on a purple to yellow gradient background]

I never had sex πŸ†πŸ‘πŸ’¦put this as your status & whoever "haha" it thinks your lying

Facebook User 2 πŸ˜‚ haha

Facebook User 1 Damn it u caught me

I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! If you'd like more information on what we do and why ...

What a hero. One like equals one prayer

What a hero. One like equals one prayer

Haven't we all?

If you're not almost dying during intercourse, you're not trying hard enough scrub

When the Discord immediately calls you out on your shit

When the Discord immediately calls you out on your shit

I only wish he'd said "thrice", would've enhanced the cringe wonderfully.

/sub/ioccasionallyhavesex

Hear ye, hear ye.

I, your humble narrator, have had occasions to engage in the carnal pleasures of the flesh upon that bed yonder thrice now.

Furthermore, I have secured for myself yet another chance to enjoy the company of a lady this forecoming Wednesday.

Hey now, good writing is concise

How am I supposed to respond to this shit? Congrats?

How am I supposed to respond to this shit? Congrats?

Is that just his default response to everything

Nice post. Just fucked the miss

Ya bro. Just had a fuck sess.

this is the most /sub/ihavesex thing ive seen on this sub

7 orgasms!

7 orgasms!

An average of 7?! I want to know his high score!

So he can't afford a Corvette, and has to use daddy's credit card to buy things. I'm so turned on. /s

the type of guy who asks if she came every 2 minutes during really awkward start-stop sex every time she even moves or makes a noise and she just says yes to avoid making it even more awkward

People who give a fuck about air quality and their carbon footprint

17 girls a week.

17 girls a week.

Can confirm. By now he has been through a quarter of the female population, and is a legend among women. Some do not believe, but I do.

I think the part about looking at a lot of dicks online is probably true.

Only 17 a week? meh, I sex at least three times as many girls in a day. all models. from sweden. who are 19.

My massive cock. I fuck about 17 girls a week on average and usually make each girl come around 3 times. They have all said my cock is absolutely massive. I've looked at a lot of porn videos to compare it and I have to agree.

I [don't?] have sex

I [don't?] have sex

If they ran away you probably pulled it out on a random girl in public

R/ihaveabigpenis

The is so me!!!

/s

πŸ…±οΈ i g πŸ…±οΈ e n i s

Important part of the review for Rainbow Six: Siege.

Important part of the review for Rainbow Six: Siege.

o b v i o u s j o k e

He had to had team killed before doe

Its PC gaming. Yah play the game for a shit-ton of time and still give it bad reviews. You can see people play games like Counter Strike for upwards of 10,000+ hours and give negative reviews, either because they changed something and now the game is garbage (such as GTA V, Company of Heros 2, etc), or because they're trolling.

sounds like something a virgin would say

He kept going

He kept going

It's written in past, present, and future tense?

When you write fiction you can use any tense you want.

Real glad he made it clear he was butt ass naked.

Most people wear a lot of clothes when they're banging.

I like to dress up like its a snow day

cause of all the white cum i spray out when im banging 5 girls at once and they all suck my dick and call me king not a brag just saying. πŸ˜ŽπŸ˜πŸ˜†πŸ™ŒπŸ™‹πŸΌβ€β™‚οΈπŸ’πŸ™πŸΌπŸ™ŒπŸ»

Try one of these subthreads