Funny funny

No one cared who I was, until I put on the mask.

No one cared who I was, until I put on the mask.

He's the hero Catham deserves, but not the one it needs right now.

You ever dance with the red dot in the pale moonlight?

"He's the hero Catham deserves, but not the one it needs right meow." FTFY.

"It would be very painful... for mew"

The best type of fist bump

Plus still giving the bump when the kid was clearly throwing shade

Edit: I'd like to thank /u/mike9797

Through his comment all other comments are possible

You can tell he's a bro and wont leave anyone hanging.

Shaq fists 30 asians

Edit: You're welcome for the warning guys.

Why you should always watch Pingu with the subtitles turned on

Why you should always watch Pingu with the subtitles turned on

Noot Noot, motherfucker.

Oh my God. I used to watch Pingu every day after school. Those subs!!

Nootflix and [chastising sounds]

GUNTHER!!!

Insurance Company - Sir, please sketch how you broke your leg

Insurance Company - Sir, please sketch how you broke your leg

Insurance Company: So you snuck up on a tree, tried to have sex with it, and it rebuffed your advances and threw you to the ground? Claim denied!

Seems like this is what the skydiving company submitted, not the person who broke his leg. See use of "Himself" and "He" rather than "Me" and "I".

You should see the claim sketch from the trees perspective ...NSFW!!

Signing a waiver doesn't mean that you can't sue, or pursue damages from their insurance.

I don't work for a skydiving company, but most companies regularly require that incident or accident reports are completed after injuries. Insurance company would want copies of these reports to defend the insured against claims or suits.

Open on Sundays too.

Open on Sundays too.

I definitely read this as mmm yaaaasssss

Most photographed maccas sign in NSW

"should we get some Mickey D's?" "Yass queen!"

TIL Australians call McDonalds "Maccas".

Close call

Close call

That's nothing. I waved my hand in front of the sun and it burned off.

That was you?!

That's nothing, I blinked and it disappeared.

You cannot hit a hologram. Idiots!

Your girlfriend isn't the only victim.

Your girlfriend isn't the only victim.
Found a picture of him as a baby.

Found a .

No offense but the other guys girlfriend is prettier.

All grown up.

That kid will grow up to be a total square.

Saw this at a bar I went to today (look at the serial number).

Saw this at a bar I went to today (look at the serial number).

Perfect. I just introduced my 5 year old to the ICUP bit yesterday to great acclaim.

Either this is another joke sticker... or American Standard has gotten in on the joke.  

http://imgur.com/gallery/uEw3fve

Either this is another joke sticker... or American Standard has gotten in on the joke.

"Ahh yes father, cracking wordplay! Whereas I was led to believe you needed assistance in spelling two simple words, I was caught in your snare of wit! But if you will excuse me, I must be going. There is an orange at the door who is to this point unidentified."

I'm sure the guy next to you was happy to hear the camera click.....

The State Department nailed my girlfriend's passport

The State Department nailed my girlfriend's passport

Mmmm.... I am an illegal alien. Must be a relative of Beldar's.

Do you know how expensive plastic surgery is?!?

She looks like she could tell you the 5 billionth digit of pi without even breaking a sweat.

Yeah she should definitely get that fixed. It's gonna cause some trouble at customs

My dad got this great card for his birthday

My dad got this great card for his birthday

Actual conversation and understandings.

Guy 1: "Hey it's windy today

(What guy 2 heard): "Hey it's Wednesday."

Guy 2: "No it's Thursday."

(What guy 3 heard): "I'm thirsty."

Guy 3: "So am I, let's have a beer "

From someone who is partially deaf and can read lips, these words are commonly mistaken.

You da real MVP.

/sub/forwardsfromgrandma

.:•.:;' .':: .•::. ••,.:' :,:;' •.,• .:•.:;' .':: .•::. ••,.:' .',".•.,'.. .',".•.,'.. .',".•.,'..

FTFY

Try one of these subthreads

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