Facepalm facepalm

Immigrants bad, says emigrant.

Immigrants bad, says emigrant.

Hey op, just an advice, next time you make a post like this, color each individual in a different color so we can know who wrote which comment without knowing their name. Not that it matters here ،but it would be really helpful for users

Spain is full of little British enclaves where expats , with no sense of irony, sit around complaining about immigrants to the UK.

Yeah, I should have done that.

I'm Australian, but work with a few UK citizens. After Brexit I asked one how he voted. He said he voted leave because "they're taking our jobs." It was kind of funny watching him search for an answer when I asked him how it was different from his parents coming to Australia.

Deadster

Deadster

I had one that lived to be 6 or 7. His name was Cheezball. He was the biggest asshole in the world.

He MURDERED every other hamster I tried to get, by repeatedly dragging them to the top of the cage and throwing them down onto hard things. This happened 3 or 4 times -- but I was a kid and thought they were sick, or died naturally somehow. The last time I only discovered what was happening because I caught him landing a fatal blow as I walked into the room (and he never did this while I was home). Then it finally sank in why the other corpses had such floppiness to them, like their spines were broken ...

Forgot to mention: the first hamster I tried to introduce Cheezball to was male. He raped the SHIT out of him (I had to stop them twice but thought they were just fighting until I put two & two together years later) ... Before killing him. He never raped/mated with a female though, as far as I saw. Which, I mean, gay hamster, that's fine. But he was a gay rapist homicidal hamster.

He would also terrorize my cat when he managed to escape (which was often ... The locks I'd have to devise became more and more complicated). He'd jump up and bite my cat in the face. My cat was pretty tough and could fight other cats, yet he wouldn't fucking go near Cheezball. And the damn rodent would carve out holes in my stuffed animals to sleep & shit in.

He was ugly as shit. I'd gotten him because he looked funny, but as he aged, his grey fur basically started to look like a tiny Einstein wig, all spiked everywhere. He also always had a mean face. I can't describe it. He just looked fucking livid, all the time.

Cheezball would also screech sometimes. I wish I'd had some method of recording it. It was like hearing a teeny old man screaming in anger.

When I tried to give him treats, he'd yank it out of my hand, stuff it into a cheek pouch, then piss and waddle away. This is how it always went. I kept trying to be nice and friendly and he just would grab, piss, and leave.

I couldn't hold him. I'm good with small animals, and knew how to get them used to handling. But not Cheezball. He wouldn't bite humans, but he'd make an angry grunt and just start forcefully leaping until he got out of your grasp. Eventually I had to give up because he was too damn good at getting away.

Eventually I just gave up owning small animals and just waited for him to die. I still took care of him like normal, but all the fun was gone. He was just this homicidal little asshole, determined to be angry as fuck at everything for no goddamn reason.

He was basically the hamster Carl Panzram. Except if Panzram lived to be 200.

And no, I don't know why my parents kept letting me have hamsters. But I'd had a great track record with every other pet ...

Then, one day, I came home from school and Cheezball was gone from his cage. I found him, burrowed into my favorite stuffed animal, looking angry as shit, and surrounded in piss, but he was dead as a doornail.

The long nightmare was finally over. Cheezball got a quick burial under a bush, but no coffin, and no kind words. I've never been relieved to have a pet die. My pets are usually family. But he was a monster.

RIP, you little shithead.

TL;DR: So, anyway, hamsters certainly can live a very long time is the point of this.

And they can be homicidal maniacs, too.

My sisters and I have owned ~10 hamsters over our childhoods. They only live 1-3 years even if they're totally healthy. A few have shown signs that they were dying, but others were fine one day and dead the next. If the hamster didn't move when I walked past it I would tap the cage or the bedding to make it move just to make sure it was still alive. They're cute and low maintenance but you can't get attached because they die so quickly.

You can tell by the groin fur that it had wet tail, which is a bacteria and/or stress induced disease in hamsters, usually from a dirty cage. It's easily preventable...

This one time I got a hamster and I brought it home. Lagter a few days he didn't do much so I went "mom why isn't bear doing much?" (I called him bear because he looked like a little tiny bear.) And she said she didn't know so we took him back to the store the next day and got him checked out and it turns out he was so constipated and they expected him to die because it... I don't know if they were lying to me or not.

Stopping the train didn't go as expected.

Stopping the train didn't go as expected.
Got a photo of it in DC https://imgur.com/4hiA60E

Got a photo of it in DC

Alright, so throw your babies ya'll that's your safest bet.

All you had to do was follow the damn train CJ!

I saw a woman do this on the Huntington metro stop except instead of a bag it was a baby in a stroller. They opened the doors for her.

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That's alot of time

That's alot of time
Alot

Thats why I prefer the 24h format it would be from 10 to 24 or 10 to 0. No way to make mistakes like that.

There are 2 facepalms here and one's in the title

You're wrong, actually.

ISO 8601 specifically states that midnight is a special case and may be referred to as either "00:00" or "24:00". There is no right or wrong connotation.

My old oven showed 24:00 at midnight and continued to 00:01. It used to make me unreasonably happy each time I saw it.

Stay safe this summer and avoid heat stroke

Stay safe this summer and avoid heat stroke

You have 30 minutes to post this to /sub/mildlypenis or I will steal your karma, OP ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

first of all how dare u

That graphic artist knew exactly what they were doing

5 MINUTES TOO LATE

Time magazine is killing it

Time magazine is killing it

THIS IS MY FAVORITE HUMAN NEWS

You are looking for /sub/softwaregore

I TOO ENJOY HUMAN NEWS, DO YOU HAVE A PET ANIMAL TOO?

YES HER NAME IS JENNY SHE IS HUMAN MUCH LIKE MYSELF

How is this real life?

How is this real life?

He's talking about Rosenstein I'd assume, who technically appointed and is the boss of Mueller.

Also, Rosenstein never meant for his memo about Comey to be used to fire him.

Edit: Wow, now I understand RIP inbox.

Lots of people are mad at me for the second comment. This was originally one of the things that was being reported, I may have heard it on NPR or Pod Save America, I'm not certain.

/u/Gnome_Sane has provided NPR's update about Rosenstein's reasoning for writing the memo, and it specifically was written to give the president basis to fire Comey. I missed that update from NPR.

Here is the permalink to /u/Gnome_Sane's comment: https://www.reddit.com/sub/facepalm/comments/6hmtvp/how_is_this_real_life/dizpt63/

This is correct; and for a homeless piece of shit, you are definitely well informed.

The world has never before seen a such a victim who claims he only wins.

This sounds terrible even for Trump.

He LITERALLY told that reporter that he fired Comey because HE. WANTED. TO. Not because of other people's recommendation.

And he is turning against his own words.

This pretty much proves that he is, indeed, panicky as fuck about this whole thing.

These two things are the same. In my opinion.

These two things are the same. In my opinion.

We have gone way too far in glorifying the value of opinions. Sure, you're entitled to one, but that means you're also entitled to be mocked and ridiculed and called out if your opinion is asinine or just plain wrong.

The thing that bothers me about 9/11 conspiracy thoerists, is that they think the government is capable of doing something like this, hide their involvement 100 percent, and not have a single credible person come out in the 16 years since to say, "Hey it was an inside job!".

The other problem I have is that they always compare shit that's nowhere near the same. When another plan crashes into another similar building, we'll talk.

You can't really have an opinion on facts. Facts are empirical and if you disagree with them, that's not your opinion, that means you're "wrong." Opinions are subjective, so there is no "right" and "wrong."

A fact is "the sky is blue. 1+1=2"

An opinion is "I dislike blue Blue is an ugly color."

e: I'm completely familiar with how perception of the sky works, but good job 👍 overly anal retentive people.

e2: if it can be proven wrong, then it's not a fact, it's a hypotheses or theory.

"I dislike blue" is a fact.

"Blue is an ugly colour" is an opinion

The design of this toaster.

Just push it back and put a plate in front and viola! No crumby fingers.

potentially a genius design if you would just have a tray in front of the toaster. I hate burning my fingers trying to get the toast out of the toaster

also, half burnt toast.

My trick is to push the toast lever back down, then quickly pull it up. The toast should shoot out far enough to be able to snatch it out of the air.

Very good point made by our commander in chief

Very good point made by our commander in chief

Don't know. What about all the wildlife that was devastated when you built all those golf courses?

Didn't he try and block a windfarm being built because it would spoil the view from a golf course he owned?

I guess they're an aesthetic disaster, better switch to those sexy looking coal mines.

Ughh... Compared to oil spills and continued damage? Compared to radio towers (yeah, it's a thing. look it up)? Compared to the smog an other pollution caused by coal and oil plants? Pretty sure it is a negative amount in aggregate.

Try one of these subthreads