comedycemetery

Apple, please explain

Apple, please explain

/sub/comedycemetery

iPhone X 64GB owner here

I don't get it

I use troth Android, Windows and Ubuntu and 😂 renders in all of them.

“Dad, what is 😂?”

We don’t know Son, we are android users

Couldn't think of anything worthy to post for my cake day, so here's some soft porn/comedy.

Couldn't think of anything worthy to post for my cake day, so here's some soft porn/comedy.
Couldn't think of anything worthy to post for my cake day, so here's some soft porn/comedy.

hey man, maybe she just wants to store the iron on top of the cabinet. Don't judge :<

Not gonna lie, I do hate a wrinkled ceiling.

Those fucking textured plaster ceilings annoy the unholy hell out of me.

My friends were tagging each other on Facebook

My friends were tagging each other on Facebook

I like how there's a ps4 logo but instead of an xbox one one it's 360

70% chance that this was made in the uk

Can the derogative "basic" also apply to men? Because this pretty much is the "basic boy/man" starter pack.

More like 100%

Been there 😂

Been there 😂

Because he meant to go to bed but didn't.

And instead played his game.

Can you explain this further

Alright, you chose to make me do this.

"Today's gonna be different! I'm going to sleep at 8 PM today!" John said to himself with a hopeful, yet optimistic attitude.

Then, he touched his controller. It felt so comfortable and so full of pleasure, John couldn't resist. He fired up a round of COD WW2, and started watching the intro animation. It all looked and felt so right. Then he joined an online lobby and oh did it feel great. He was a higher level than everyone else, just like all the other times he had played. He felt a lot of pride, because of his excellent status as a pro gamer. He started to press the trigger buttons, and oh the vibrations! The vibrations pleasured John, yet they made him horny. "No, it's not time for that yet, I just started playing!" John thought to himself. Then, he remembered to check the time.

"......................Is that the sun?" he said, now fully exhausted. His school was about to start in 10 minutes, how had his parents not checked up on him?!

John was getting quite anxious, ms. White had warned him of his filthy gaming addict, and how it'd eventually ruin his poor life. A bunch of haste was starting to build up inside him from all of the adrenaline, John had to hurry up! He ran to get his clothes, but ended up instead ditching everything and running directly towards the school with only his 3 week old underwear on, which he even came in quite a few times. On his way to the classroom, he saw his crush staring at him. "Pretty impressive dong, ain't it?" said John, who wasn't educated in social ethics.

"I call it the "lady stabber", m'lady!" he said, proud of what he had come up with. His crush, Sophie was quite a nice girl, but even she couldn't hold in the laughter. Everyone had come to laugh at what they just heard, John's ego was crushed.

John felt like a punching bag, every single person in the school had come to laugh at him. Even his crush was a little bitch who didn't know a good man when she saw one. He didn't want to live with all of the idiots around him anymore, he had to find some new dimension suitable for a demigod gamer like himself, who also had quite a nice taste for style with his expensive 20$ fedora. "I know what I'll do! I'll zap myself with an electrical cable to get sucked into the game!" John thought to himself, while tasting his cold booger.

He immediately started running towards his home Naruto style. He had learned this secret way of running from the almighty anime gods, but the information wasn't directly fed to his genius brain. He had to study the ways of Naruto, which took him many weeks of training. His room was quite literally impossible to breath in, and he was about to die before he got saved by "the birther". She thought there was a dead body in there, so she spent an entire day cleaning it. Finally John had arrived at his -home- apartment.

The birther was quite surprised to see John, but she didn't hesitate to let him in. John almost felt like she was expecting him to travel to the gaming dimension through the cable portal that day. "You came home quite early today" the birther said quite suspiciously. John didn't even respond, he just ran straight towards his room. He saw the cable, oh how its shape aroused him. He was just thinking about all the fun he was gonna have in the gaming dimension, now that he was gonna be sucked into it. He ran towards the cable without wasting any time, as he was getting more aroused by the second. He ended up touching the end of the HDMI cable while turning on his PS4. He got quite surprised and upset when he found out that he couldn't enter the gaming dimension.

He ended up asking in a comments section about Hentai babes about his problem, on his favorite website 9GAG. "TV cable not working, how do I enter gaming dimension with endless Doritos and fun?" he wrote. After 2 hours, John finally got an answer. "Drink bleach😂" it said. "Birther, give me some bleach!" John shouted at his mom. "Did you make a mess in there? What happened, tell me!" his mom shouted in quite a disappointed way. "Now!" he demanded.

He ended up getting his way, his mom didn't know what was going on; she thought that he was gonna try and clean something up for himself for the first time in ages. John ended up finishing the entirely brand new bottle. "Bottom's up" were his last words, before he died from poisoning. He could really take a lot of bleach for a thin 400 lb kid."

There, I wrote it all in very EXCRUCIATING detail, will you please shut up now? Poor John had to DIE for you!

In the end, he saw the sun and got surprised.

she is breathing underwater XD

she is breathing underwater XD

That's pretty QUIRKY

....O

A weathered document from a forgotten time.

You've been hoodwinked by their vanilla-style attractiveness.

mister potter no here

mister potter no here

Oh, I get it! It's funny because that IS Mr Potter, but he has disguised himself as a Hispanic gentleman, and as Mr Potter is not Hispanic, Voldemort does not recognise him!

Well played, Mr Potter. Well played indeed.

?

i laugh but who harry oitter?

its me senior hamburguesa

no harry potter here hee hee burrito

Judging by their looks of despair and confusion, the death eaters must have realized they've been trapped in a shitty meme by the last panel.

r/CringeAnarchy not even hiding it anymore..

r/CringeAnarchy not even hiding it anymore..

this phone's battery is at 1% and needs charging!

I am a bot. I use OCR to detect battery levels. Sometimes I make mistakes. sorry. info

Wasn't the creator of this pile of garbage a Neo-Nazi?

Also, nice strawman

As much as I enjoying knowing a coonfucker posted this, I'm pretty sure you're supposed to block usernames.

This is the only comment I'd dare upvote in this whole thread

Peter made me remember gumwaa

Peter made me remember gumwaa

/sub/wholesomecomedycemetery

/sub/ovenbakedmemes

Did he just call his girlfriend an object?

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Britney Spears' Instagram is a gold mine of cringe

Britney Spears' Instagram is a gold mine of cringe

She's a Disney mom posting Disney mom humor. The fact that she's a foxy celebrity with a Vegas residency is secondary.

/sub/oldpeoplefacebook

>unironical use of the laughing crying emoji

/sub/comedyceme… wait

Didn't see start her career as a Disney starlet, even?

Try one of these subthreads