askwomen

What female character tropes/cliches irritate you the most?

What female character tropes/cliches irritate you the most?

personally I fume when a female character does something badass and turns to the male characters and says "I have brothers"

Anna awoke as the warm sun cascaded over her soft, naked breasts. She threw off the covers and stretched, lifting her breasts. She was aware of her breasts as she swished boobily to her closet.

Women of Reddit, if you could send a letter back in time, what advice would you give to yourself 300 million years ago when atmospheric oxygen levels peaked at 35%?

Women of Reddit, if you could send a letter back in time, what advice would you give to yourself 300 million years ago when atmospheric oxygen levels peaked at 35%?

Dear Atlas_Mech,

I am so sorry. The experiment went wrong, and sent you, a perfectly innocent and unsuspecting passerby, back in time 300 million years. We are trying desperately to reverse this, but we're not even sure how it occurred. It may take several days at the very least, and honestly you're probably not going to survive that long. That does not mean we will not try.

You will be buried a hero, that I promise you.

Now there are some things I should go over before you completely change the past - which you should NOT do! If you change the past then there is a chance that humanity will never exist, and you will be stuck there forever.

Rule 1: Please avoid lightning.

Rule 2: The only food you may have access to is algae or plankton. There is a chance you are not near a body of water, however, and I must stress the importance that you do not travel more then five square miles from where you currently stand - otherwise I cannot guarantee your return.

Rule 3: Collect samples of the dirt and rocks in your pockets. Not much is known about this period in earth's history.

Rule 4: Breathe slowly and shallowly. Oxygen is but 35%. Try not to panic. Hyperventilation is to be avoided.

Well, that's all I have for advice, seeing as we don't know much about this period.

Now for some assurances:

Your cat is fed. The world has agreed to share the samples you bring back. We are in talks with the UN that you not be dissected for science upon your return under the premise that a first-hand description will be more valuable - so remember what you've seen.

You are in our thoughts and we are working tirelessly for your return.

Safe travels, Shady Scientist

Edit: Thanks for the gold!! Wowza!

Also, sorry for scientific inaccuracies, he was a shady scientist for a reason.

Why is it so common for women to say that they don't get along with "other women"?

Why is it so common for women to say that they don't get along with "other women"?

Over the years I've noticed that many women in my life have mentioned this to me, particularly my own mother who says it regularly. But also my stepmother, a few close friends and several acquaintances. I hear this a lot in passing too. It always strikes me as odd, I've never heard a guy say it except for a few times but it seems to be more of a "thing" for women.

I've also noticed some of the women who say this (from my experience anyway) often had other women friends which makes it extra confusing.

Can someone explain this "phenomena"? I want to understand this issue better, any help would be appreciated. Have you ever said this? If so, what lead you to that line of thinking? Do you know women like this, what do you make of it? Thanks :)

I don't think there's a one-size-fits-all answer for this one. It depends on the woman.

Some women have more hobbies and interests in common with men, so they get along easier.

Some women get burned by toxic friendships with other women or feel excluded by them, so they think all women must be like that and turn to men for friendship. While obviously not all women are like that, I can sympathize with this group because I've been bullied and backstabbed by girls plenty of times, and it can affect how much you trust them.

Some women just really don't like other women, and there isn't always a good reason. In my personal experience, women who fall into this category are usually insecure and don't like to be part of a circle that includes other women because they like being special or the "token girl" of the group. I try to avoid women like this because they often tend to be nasty to other women.

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All of my past boyfriends have been lactose intolerant, and a statistically confusing amount have later come out as gay. What odd patterns or coincidences do you see in your dating history?

All of my past boyfriends have been lactose intolerant, and a statistically confusing amount have later come out as gay. What odd patterns or coincidences do you see in your dating history?

Edit: Ya'll I'm US based. Only 25% of Americans are lactose intolerant. It's weird to date 5 people and have ALL of them be lactose intolerant. I get that it's not globally strange, but it is bizarre on a national level.

I dated four men in a row whose first name was Jonathan but who go exclusively by their middle names. I didn't find out they were going by their middle names until after we had been dating for a while. By the fourth one I was like "are you fucking kidding me??"

Women who have been involuntarily alone/undatable your whole lives - due to looks, weight, disability, illness, etc - how do you cope with the lonliness and isolation?

Women who have been involuntarily alone/undatable your whole lives - due to looks, weight, disability, illness, etc - how do you cope with the lonliness and isolation?

Because I'm middle aged now, and not doing well at all . . .

EDIT: Wow, this turned out to be much more popular than I expected! There are so many of us struggling with this, I guess, and really no IRL environment in which we can openly discuss it.

I'm 26 and haven't been even close to a relationship in 4 years. I've moved around a lot too, so friends are kinda... sparse, or not where I am. I occasionally visit them or they visit me here, but we're talking once or twice a year. I play football and get on with my team, but they're not really friend friends yet - it is a good way to start out in a new place, I've found. I get on with the people at work, but they're all a lot older than me.

So most of the time, I do stuff alone. Weekends when I don't go out to the shop/pub, I might only speak to my mum on the phone.

Key is to me: Get comfortable with yourself. It's harder than it sounds. But like yourself. Have fun by yourself. Buy yourself things. Hang out with friends when you can, but really, be happy hanging out with yourself. I got paid yesterday, but had nobody to go out with, do something fun with - so I bought myself a nice Turkish takeaway, found a film to watch, lit my candles, put my little dangly lights on, had an ice cold cider and chilled the fuck out. Tonight I got myself a frozen mojito packet and am gonna make steak.

I do me. If someone turns up who wants in on that, great, awesome. If they don't? I'm not fussed. Being on your own has awesome advantages too. I'm applying for all sorts of jobs all over the place. Because if I get it, I can just pack my stuff and go. I can hang out in no clothes if I want to. I can watch trashy tv and not be judged. I can cook stuff I want to eat and experiment. If it goes wrong, the only person who has to eat it is me.

I am possibly just a bit weird, but it doesn't bother me too much. I lack self-confidence sometimes, but that wouldn't really change - I just hold myself to high standards in a lot of things, and if I don't meet it, I lose a ton of confidence. But that's not to do with other people really.

Mothers of dragons, how has having a dragon changed how you view lizards, or given you a different understanding of reptiles?

Mothers of dragons, how has having a dragon changed how you view lizards, or given you a different understanding of reptiles?

It's given me a new appreciation for the tags that come on baby pajamas declaring that the clothing is not flame retardant.

What's the juiciest piece of gossip you know about someone in your social circle that you've been dying to get off your chest?

What's the juiciest piece of gossip you know about someone in your social circle that you've been dying to get off your chest?

I've read all of /sub/relationships and mamma needs her fill.

Edit

OK, since this comment has become so popular I decided to edit out a lot of the details because I don't want it to be too obvious in case someone involved reads this.

So here's the vague tl;dr.

My coworker is one of two "bridesmen" in a wedding. He is friends with both the bride and groom. During the bachelorette party a few weeks ago, the bride hooked up with the other bridesman (not my coworker.) My coworker found out and threatened to tell the groom if the bride didn't fess up. She tells my coworker that she told the groom everything and the wedding is still on. My coworker is unconvinced that she's telling the truth, and feels really guilty for not telling the groom himself. The wedding is this weekend. (Cue dramatic music)

Why does Reddit seem male-dominated, even though almost half of users are female?

Why does Reddit seem male-dominated, even though almost half of users are female?

From the Wiki page:

According to Reddit's Audience and Demographics page, as of December 2015, 53% of redditors are male.

In my experience Reddit is a pretty hostile environment for women, so I was surprised to hear that statistic.

Women may refrain from making comments because everyone else is hostile to women. Also "male as default" syndrome... people just assume everyone is a dude unless stated otherwise in gender neutral topics.

Also I've been a regular user on Reddit for maybe 5 years now, when I started it wasn't as evenly split. It was more like 70% dude so gross sexist things against women is basically ingrained in the culture here. It's gotten a lot better :)

What fictional couple do you think most realistically shows what a healthy relationship is like?

What fictional couple do you think most realistically shows what a healthy relationship is like?

The world in which they live doesn't have to be realistic (like if they come from a science fiction universe or something), but rather just the way the two relate to each other.

Couples from movies, tv shows, books, comics, whatever are all eligible. Even couples that didn't end up together in the end are welcome for consideration.

Gomez and Morticia Addams.

Let's talk GREEN flags. What are some early (1-3 dates) signs that the person is the real deal?

Let's talk GREEN flags. What are some early (1-3 dates) signs that the person is the real deal?

We talk about red flags a lot, but what about greens? What little things tip you off about a person that gives you the feeling that they're a good person, and it's not an act?

When I first started dating my husband I was surprised at how often he'd reference something I'd told him days or weeks earlier. The motherfucker was actually listening when I spoke. It blew my mind.

Try one of these subthreads