My Sister had her first "Ew, Breastfeeding!" moment in Public. It ended up being awesome.
Posted with permission from my sister, cause she doesn't reddit and the world deserves to hear this. Background, my sister just recently gave birth to my nephew who is the world's cutest little boy and I will fight you if you say otherwise.
Story from my Sister:
So at China grill I had my first “gross she’s breastfeeding moment” it was by a 12 year old girl and her dads response was gold
Girl “ew she has her tit out”
Dad” no she’s feeding her baby it’s natural”
Girl “well if she can have her boobs out why can’t I get a bikini”
Dad” because you’re 12 and ain’t feeding no body but perverts”
Girl”can’t she do it some where like the bathroom”
Dad “ sure she can you go eat your dinner your bathroom too. Actually maybe she shouldn’t feed her baby at all just like I shouldn’t be feeding a rude little girl”
he then takes her plate from her and looked her dead in the eye
Dad” that right there is the most natural beautiful thing as a mother, your momma fed you that way, someday you will feed your baby that way and someone will say it’s gross and it’ll hurt your feelings. That lil baby wants to eat and if you want to eat you will not be thinking such rude things again. I raised you better.”
She slumped in her seat and and huffed he wouldn’t give her her plate back till she changed her attitude.
Random Dad, you officially win, and I'm only sorry I wasn't there to make your meal on me.
I was on a plane once and a mother across the isle from me began to feed her very small baby (couldn’t tell if it was a male or female, it was just cute as a button either way). The man sitting next to her had gone to the restroom and when he came back he openly scoffed and told her that he wouldn’t sit next to her while she exposed herself.
I wish I was brave enough to say something, but I didn’t have to; an older woman sitting behind the young mother stood up and told the man she would switch seats. He took her up on the offer, but the young mother looked near tears. The older woman leaned in and I could barely hear “the child shouldn’t be around idiots at such a young age. Never let anyone tell you how to raise your child.”
I’ll never forget that woman. She didn’t make a scene. No one clapped. She didn’t do it for attention. The man didn’t even hear it as he had his headphones on. She just cared enough for the woman and her child to make sure she wasn’t harassed by a piece of shit. I have seen a lot of goodness out of people, I try to emulate it and pass it foreword. If you can, maybe one day we will all outnumber the idiots.
The only memorable time I saw someone breast feeding in public I was at Target and the lady was feeding her baby, talking on the phone, and pushing her cart along shopping all at the same time! I looked at my sister and said damn she's got skills
I faced more criticism for breast feeding in America than I did anywhere else.
My girl was born in Germany and I went back to Turkey when she was three weeks old.
in Germany people didn't even look twice.
in Turkey old ladies flagged down younger people to translate or mimed their question about whether I was breast feeding. When I said yes, they were ecstatic.
People were fawning over my baby, as typically moms don't leave the house until babies are older, so most had never seen a baby that small... and definitely not one that was so pale.
I thought at first they were being a bit "hide that" when they offered me private places to feed but someone finally explained that I just looked uncomfortable (I was nervous about it, for sure). No matter where I was someone would find me a chair. Bring me free water or juice or a snack for while I fed her. The only concern seemed to be if the kid was happy, which seemed a huge cultural change from the us (lots of restaurants have playgrounds attached for instance).
But flying on the plane to the US, someone complained on the plane (I even covered up). someone stared at me the whole time at the airport when I landed, too. and pretty much everywhere I went, someone would stare or mention something. very few supportive comments, except when a store employee or the flight attendant told the complainer that I was just fine to feed her.
My girl couldn't take a bottle due to a bad tongue tie, or I might have chickened out and switched to bottles sooner.
My most memorable breastfeeding moment was nursing my baby in my car and looking up to make accidental eye contact with a teenage boy walking by.
He promptly went beet red, then pale, then tripped over a shopping cart and then tripped over his own feet as he ran away. I laughed so hard it was hard to breathe.
Fortunately these kids will all be able to vote to make changes in who is leading their communities in the coming years.
holy shit you delusional fuck.
No one should have to shoulder such a responsibility. But you and your schoolmates are making ALL of us so proud! Your courage and light is a beacon! And we all need to rally to these kids and demand this travesty end!
Actually not true. The US and it’s rate of gun violence and gun related deaths is not on par with other western nations. 3.85 deaths per 100,000 is closer to Iraq’s rate of 4.85 in 2016. 2010 OECD data suggests that Americans are 51 times more likely to be killed by gunfire than people in the UK.
You’re right in that mass shootings don’t account for most gun deaths. Suicides do. Did you know that research suggests that it can take as little as five minutes to dissuade someone from suicide? Id bet a lot of money that not having something as easy as a gun nearby could make a difference. And it does. When Australia brought in tougher gun laws, instituted a gun buyback scheme, suicides by gun dropped as much as 80%. Suicides by means other than gun stayed flat and homicides by gun dropped between 30 and 50%. Australia still has guns, I might add. They’re just regulated and licensed. It’s substantially harder to take a gun and kill seventeen kids. Its harder to walk into a hotel, kill 58 people and injure another 800. Is it perfect? No. Will it work in the US? Probably not in the same way. Do you owe it to every kid in the US that is dead as the result of a gun, that carries a bulletproof backpack or rubber doorstops to blockade doors, to at least think about licensing, educating and regulating gun owners? I think you do. And so do a lot of people outside and inside the USA.
Is there a fund for Leigh Corfman? I'd donate to her to help get him convicted of being a pedophile.
Can't he just use the money he stole from his charity?
There he is in the news again. How the hell does anyone like this pathetic piece of shit, let alone support him? let alone send him any fucking money. What a shit show.
Because, to the evangelical right, the only thing worse than a pedophile is a liberal.
Rape kits STD tests, usually repeated a couple of times to make sure morning after pill counseling
Rape can also cause physical injury which requires medical treatment. I had to have stitches.
Ok I’m being really serious here, please help me understand
I’m a 42 male, I don’t actually know what can go medically wrong with a person who has been raped
It’s not like anyone ever taught me
Please enlighten me
I will never understand how people who claim to be religious can embrace and vote for him. I think the only commandment he hasn't broken has been not murdering somebody.
Because he truly reflects and embodies what they are and stand for: Judging others while being a hypocrite.
"I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn't lose any voters, OK?"
Let’s not forget this pussy grabber paid a porn star to keep quiet.
Master of the deal
"At their peak, Jane was performing abortions four days a week and typically serving 10 women a day. Galatzer-Levy says that to the best of her knowledge, the group never turned anyone away."
On the one hand, what these women did was an incredible service. On the other it was sad abortion was ever illegal and that people address trying to make it illegal again.
No one likes abortion, but no matter what women will find ways to get abortions for unwanted pregnancies. Best to make it legal and as safe as possible.
No matter how you look at it the problem is that we are making it harder and harder for women to get an abortion and forcing them into more desperate situations when they are already faced with a very bad one (needing an abortion) as is.
It just blows the mind...
A couple years back, I had made copies of a zine that I found that went into the process of making your own menstrual extraction devices that I think can also be used as an at-home abortion kit. The whole kit costs less than $50 and looks easy to clean. Apparently there's still groups of women who do at home menstrual extractions.
Basically this. Obviously, the first question that comes to mind is "is this safe?" Well, just as with any procedure carried out by someone in medical scrubs, there are always risks to consider which can be mitigated with education and experience. Although I do not have these kinds of parts or ever have to worry myself with this, I completely understand someone wanting to teach themselves about it.
To put it another way, no one should ever have to pull a bullet out of their guts but it can save your life if you know how to.
Edit: Spelling of words
Aziz did nothing wrong, why are you banning his supporters?
Things have gotten really weird in twox when a post that says "Aziz did nothing wrong" gets upvoted. I think most reasonable people would agree that, while he isn't guilty of sexual assault, and he didn't deserve to be humiliated on a national stage the way he was, his actions were pretty scummy and uh, "wrong".
If a woman removes her hand from your penis, and you keep putting it back anyway, that's scummy. If a woman tells you "I don't want to feel forced," and you pretend to understand but then shortly thereafter take your clothes off and hers, too, then that is pretty scummy.
This is the sort of selfish, aggressive behaviour from men that has been depicted as normal in our sexual culture. In popular media, it has been commonplace to see men persistently push for sex with a reluctant partner. It has been seen as romantic and manly behaviour - and the reluctance on the part of the woman was seen as expected and just something to overcome. It's important that this conversation, now that we're having it, includes the message that this should no longer be considered "normal". We can and should teach the next generation to think about sex differently.
The reality is most people only want to hear opinions and thoughts that mirror their own. Most also like to get caught up in waves of righteous indignation, so it only makes sense that herd mentality would prevail.
The sad thing is banning discussion is banning the idea to question the "Victim". I had a girl initiate spooning and then accuse me of sexual assault because she had a boyfriend and needs to make herself out to be a victim instead of the piece of shit that she is. Her boyfriend is acting like the "victim" is infallable and not to even ask the supposed "accused" story. If he did he'd know what happened.
Disagreeing shouldn't be a banable offense....
the accuser claimed that the “Master of None” star ignored numerous non-verbal “cues” indicating that she “wasn’t interested” in having sex
the accuser admitted that she willingly engaged in oral sex with the comedian afterwards
yes, and after a thorough reading of the situation. i think “grace” overreacted and overdramatized a situation and could’ve cost a guy his career.
You didn't read the article if you think he did nothing wrong.
Either that or your moral compass is non existent.
Saying "i'll knock you in the nuts if you don't stop" however is a very clear message as is just verbalizing the word NO.
Giving man a blowjob on the other hand...
If you don't want to have sex with someone, don't go home with them and don't invite them into your home after a date!
Here's a list of things I know from personal experience you can do with a guy at his or your apartment after a date that do not involve sex:kiss/make out watch a movie play video games have coffee or drinks have passionate discussions about art or politics get a back rub give a back rub any combination of the above there are more
While I understand that this new Aziz expose is complicated and worth discussing, I don't think it's productive to refer back to the unspoken rules of an era that should be over now, in which a woman going to a man's home (or wearing a short skirt? Smiling? Having an alcoholic beverage? Going to a bar?) = consenting to sex.
This is the problem with the #metoo movement. She's not a victim. She went back to his apartment on the first date. If non-verbal cues is the equivalent of non-consent, then asking someone to go with you is the equivalent of saying "I want to have sex with you." She wasn't forced to go home with him. She could've ended the date after dinner, or went to a bar. How is going to someone's apartment who you barely know any other indicator?
I disagree. I’ve been to a guy’s house for dinner on a third date and strictly made it clear we wouldn’t be having sex. We kissed and I left at the end. He respected me more for making him wait.
You set your intentions before you went over though, and your date respected that, which is great! If only every date should be so coherent. In the Aziz Ansari account, there was very poor communication on both ends. The situation is unfortunate for both parties, there is no need to ruin someones career over it.
My former boss mailed me a vibrator.
Last week, I found out that my former supervisor from a job I left in August, an older man who I trusted and considered to be a mentor and friend, is behind a series of anonymous "prank" packages I've been receiving. The first, sent to my house on my birthday from a local post office, contained an adult toy and all the necessary accessories to use such an object. When I first received it, I figured it must be a prank from one of my close girlfriends and was a good sport about it. After a few weeks, no one had confessed and it suddenly became less funny and more creepy. The second package was sent to my office before Christmas, nearly an hour away, from a US post office near my workplace, contained hygiene products (including a large bottle of Summers Eve feminine wash), and a note proclaiming that it was sent from my new coworkers as a Secret Santa gift. This crossed the line, I'm a professional and I take my new job very seriously. Obviously, I don't need to be receiving embarrassing anonymous packages to the office and now it was apparent that someone knew very well where I lived and worked and had traveled there to mail the packages priority overnight. I actually called this guy the night I received it to see if he knew of anyone at my former office that could be behind this, and he pretended not to know anything. Eventually he called me to confess in a fit of guilt, saying that it had been bothering him since I called and his wife finally got him to confess to sending me "practical joke packages" (for the record, I don't know if he told her what was in them), and she told him that he had to call me because I was probably freaking out, which I was.
My question is, what the hell do I do now? Obviously I have no desire to continue what I thought was a valuable mentorship with someone influential in my industry. I know that this is not my fault in any way, and I've always maintained appropriate boundaries. The last few months at the previous job were stressful for both of us because of organizational changes that led to his leaving as well, so it's possible that he got the nature of our relationship twisted during that time period and after when I no longer worked for him. Do I have any obligations as a feminist to take steps to prevent him from doing this to the next woman who reports to him? Can I afford to take him at his word that he meant it all to be a joke and had no idea I would take it this way and wouldn't do it again? What on earth is wrong with men like this?
I would take him by his actions rather than his word. Assuming you had no history of joking about masturbation or feminine products this definitely doesn’t fall into the joke category.
I would send him a message to his work email asking him to never do that again. Hopefully he would reply and acknowledge his actions. I would then present that situation to his company’s HR highlighting how inappropriate it was and that it could have negatively impacted your career at your new employer. They should then have a procedure to train him and will hopefully prevent him from doing something like this again
I would still report it to his company’s HR. They have an interest in knowing how their managers treat former employees.
He also needs to get some training or other help. The fact that he is playing off his actions as a joke makes it seem like he’s not really owning up to what he has done. I wouldn’t be convinced that he won’t cross lines again with you or someone else.
You said you considered him a mentor and a friend (at one point). Can you talk to him about what he did and why it offended you?
I mean, I get that there are whole ton of reasons why you wouldn't want to. But if that avenue is still available and you feel safe enough to take it, then it might be valuable.
Yeah getting something in writing is a good idea. Just in case he pulls something else ever, I have the option to report him at any time. I’m just trying to decide how far I should go with this now. I guess it’s difficult because until last week I really trusted and thought I knew this guy, so it’s throwing me for a bit of a loop.