Showerthoughts

You know you're getting old when you agree with the antagonist in teen movies. The principal in "Ferris Bueller" was just trying to make sure a troubled teen got an education, and he's the bad guy?

You know you're getting old when you agree with the antagonist in teen movies. The principal in "Ferris Bueller" was just trying to make sure a troubled teen got an education, and he's the bad guy?

The principal in Ferris Bueller did go to some pretty extreme, and some would say inappropriate, lengths however.

I think it's overlooked how bad the zombies would smell in a zombie apocalypse

I think it's overlooked how bad the zombies would smell in a zombie apocalypse

They address it in The Walking Dead a lot.

Plenty of people being repulsed by the smell, especially from sheltered people who don't have much exposure to the walkers.

People who press "Camera" when changing a profile picture must be pretty damn confident

People who press "Camera" when changing a profile picture must be pretty damn confident

I usually press "camera" optimistically, then it's like WOAH NELLY! Abort! Abort! (inb4 "That's what your mom should've done")

If I see someone walking the street alone at night, I automatically assume they're up to something shady. If I see that same person walking with a dog, I automatically assume they're more trustworthy than an average person.

If I see someone walking the street alone at night, I automatically assume they're up to something shady. If I see that same person walking with a dog, I automatically assume they're more trustworthy than an average person.

That's why I always bring my dog when I'm up to something shady.

It would be really annoying if gravity pulled with a slight angle instead of straight down.

It would be really annoying if gravity pulled with a slight angle instead of straight down.

The earth would spin faster and faster. Days would get shorter and shorter, until some sort of equilibrium were reached where it would feel like gravity was pulling down. Or. It would continue accelerating forever coming asymptotically closer to the speed of light causing time to stand relatively still.

My dog's memory lives on through my login passwords.

My dog's memory lives on through my login passwords.

Edit: thanks for the gold, kind stranger! Great, My most popular post is the most dangerous to my login security.

His name was Password.... Oh Passy, I'll never forget you :'(

Eating zero cookies is easy. Eating many cookies is really easy. But eating a single cookie is hard as fuck.

Eating zero cookies is easy. Eating many cookies is really easy. But eating a single cookie is hard as fuck.

Fuck.

I eat a single cookie all the time.

Usually right after I ate a single cookie.

Whenever I see another car pulled over by the police I always feel like a gazelle watching another gazelle get mauled by a lion

Whenever I see another car pulled over by the police I always feel like a gazelle watching another gazelle get mauled by a lion

Better you than me!

hops away

Anyone who says self-driving cars couldn't compete with human drivers on snowy roads, has clearly never seen human drivers on snowy roads.

Anyone who says self-driving cars couldn't compete with human drivers on snowy roads, has clearly never seen human drivers on snowy roads.

It's not easy to do a 360 on the interstate.

Relationships are just two people constantly asking each other what they want to eat, until one of them dies

Relationships are just two people constantly asking each other what they want to eat, until one of them dies

That's true except for the fact that it's completely bullshit.

Try one of these subthreads

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