ScottishPeopleTwitter

Scottish junkies are superior to the American crackhead in every way

Scottish junkies are superior to the American crackhead in every way

Don't think I've ever seen an American "bragging" about crackheads

There's not much that tops the junkie hoovering the puddles in Glasgow

Give this thread some time

What‘s the difference between a junkie and a crackhead? A junkie will just steal your wallet, a crackhead will also help you look you for it.

Lightning Lizzie

Lightning Lizzie

Running with scissors, no less. Absolute mad lass.

kachow!

Thought she was doing the robot

That's how she earned the title in the first place if I remember correctly

They're a strange lot in the Kingdom

They're a strange lot in the Kingdom

That's what inbreeding does to you

People who say house coat should be shot.

It's like calling your baffies a "gaff shoe"

Not a thing

Heard baffie means fanny in Inverness. True or no?

Round my way, we call a fanny a slipper, so we come full circle now. We also call a cock a foot... we have low birth rates.

Great Wall a China

Great Wall a China

Don't mean to sound like a prick however you can't exactly walk the whole thing. It's loads of bits scattered about which aren't all joined up and very few bits are maintained. Source; I camped on one part of the Great Wall in summer and walked along it until it ended (didn't take 18 months though)

In awe at the size of this wall. Absolute unit

It actually takes 18 months to walk the full Great Wall of China. What the actual fuck. I thought it was like a day out you could do.

From Wikipedia:

A comprehensive archaeological survey, using advanced technologies, has concluded that the Ming walls measure 8,850 km (5,500 mi). This is made up of 6,259 km (3,889 mi) sections of actual wall, 359 km (223 mi) of trenches and 2,232 km (1,387 mi) of natural defensive barriers such as hills and rivers. Another archaeological survey found that the entire wall with all of its branches measure out to be 21,196 km (13,171 mi).

So, either 5,500 miles, 3,889 miles for just the walls, or 13,171 miles for the entire thing.

I walked 26 miles in a day once (not for a marathon - it was the longest day on a walk that lasted about a week) and I think that's about as much as I could do, especially considering that a lot of the Great Wall goes over mountains, etc.. Maybe someone very fit could do more like 50, if they got up early and walked briskly.

At 50 miles/day, 5,500 miles would take 110 days (or 220 for 25 miles a day).

3,889 miles would take 78 days/156 days.

13,171 miles would take 263 days/527 days.

18 months is around 547 days.

So... this sounds like 18 months is the estimate to walk the entire length of the wall and all of its branches, doing less than 25 miles a day. Or possibly that even doing 25 miles a day over that sort of terrain would be extreme and the estimate is that you could walk the 5,500 miles in 18 months, doing around 12 miles a day.

Season ticket holder

Season ticket holder

'slip knot season ticket holder' 10/10

When I was a kid a thought chinky was what the food was called, used to say " am going to the Chinese for a chinky"

I knew a guy who didnt realise chink was a slur until he used it in a casual convo with an asian girl he was trying to get with.

He did not get with her.

Don't understand scottish still laughed

Oh my god trampoline

Oh my god trampoline

Trambopoleen!

Tramampoline!

Yeah, found the owners:

https://www.reddit.com/sub/gifs/comments/7ncag4/good_guy_hurricane

Please, don’t bring home any more old crutches!

She doesny carrot all

She doesny carrot all

That's creative. I'm not even mad.

/sub/frugal_jerk

Title is gold.

This fat cat discovered one simple trick to beat your hunger this winter!

Press F to pay respects.

Press F to pay respects.

Translation: My mother is still bugging me about a house party I had 5 years ago. She literally just turned around to me and said, "that wheely bin hasn't been the same since". Ha ha ha, give me strength.

A trash bin with wheels

What's a wheely bin?

I can tell you from first-hand experience that yes, she does.

Aye just a wee side note

Aye just a wee side note

Real journalism

Aye, but if swinging a Machete around is illegal then slap on the cuffs and call me Sandra

I mean, it's Independent. It always seemed a bit rightwingy silly to me but this is a breitbart level of misinformation.,

crop off bottom 1/3 of picture post to t_d profit

Nute™️

Nute™️

what the fuck is this pish

Made by someone whose only experience of Irish people is through animated leprechauns.

Image Transcription: Twitter Post

me getting some irish dick: oh god please dont stop

him: aye ya loike that do ye? Wud ye loike if ah went arder? Wud ye loike that ya littol sloot?

me: uh... y..yeah...

him: whut was that?

me: uh... aye...

him: [A hand moving quickly towards a large button labelled nute]

I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit. If  you'd like more information on what we do and why...

That’s more Devonshire than Irish

Try one of these subthreads