TIL That Dire Elephants are the Most Terrifying Creatures in DnD
I was looking through the 3.5 Monster Manual 2 when I came across the stat blocks for various dire animals, including the dire elephant. What I saw terrified me to my core. It wasn't the fact that they are the size of a Wyrm Silver Dragon, or that they have a gore attack that does 4d6+22. No, what terrifies me is that they have a climb speed of 10 feet.
Yes, these towering monstrosities with no grasping digits to speak of have a climb speed, which means they can always take 10 on a climb roll, even when threatened or rushed. But wait, it gets worse. They have a climb check modifier of +23. This means that no matter what, a Dire Elephant can get a 33 on all of its climb checks (save having its strength drained or movement impaired in some other way). What does that allow it to do? According to the Player's Handbook, the DC for climbing a slippery overhang or ceiling with handholds but no footholds is 30. Imagine you are walking through a tropical forest, one of the dire elephant's habitats, and you hear some rustling coming from the trees above you. You look up to see a herd of dire elephants hanging under the branches of the canopy looking for fruit. I would be scared shitless. Give me a mindflayer or the tarrasque, at least those make sense. I don't want to know what sort of dark ancient pact was made allowing this to happen, but I am not okay with it.
...how in the hell do they have a Climb of +23
I watched an elephant lose its balance trying to get up onto a box once
You look up to see a herd of dire elephants hanging under the branches of the canopy looking for fruit.
Dire Elephant Bats?
Very. The answer is very.
Climb is strength-based, your example is dexterity-based.
But yeah, something went terribly wrong in translation.
[5e] Was reading through the Monster Manual and I noticed this gem...
"Disclaimer: Any similarities between monsters depicted in this book and monsters that actually exist are purely coincidental. That goes double for mind flayers, which absolutely, utterly, and completely do not exist, nor do they secretly run the D&D team. Do we really need a disclaimer to tell you that? You shouldn't use your brain to consider such irrational thoughts. They only make the mind cluttered, confused, and unpleasantly chewy. A good brain is nice, tender, and barely used. Go ahead, put down this book and watch some reality TV or Internet cat videos. They're really funny these days. You won't regret it. We say this only because we love you and your juicy, succulent gamer brain."
My personal fave is the disclaimer in the DMG. It ends with the suggestion that a DM just roll a bunch of dice behind a screen and declare that Tiamat swoops down from the sky and attacks the players.
I keep doing this every time my players make the situation difficult. Just pick up all my dice, roll em, pretend to study them and say the magic words:"Tiamat swoops out of the sky!"
I'm a big sucker for the old "Rocks fall everyone Dies"
This is one of my favourite D&D stories.
...In the early seventies, Ed Whitchurch ran "his game," and one of the participants was Eric Sorenson. Eric plays something like a computer. When he games he methodically considers each possibility before choosing his preferred option. If given time, he will invariably pick the optimal solution. It has been known to take weeks. He is otherwise, in all respects, a superior gamer.
Eric was playing a Neutral Paladin in Ed's game. He was on some lord's lands when the following exchange occurred:
ED: You see a well groomed garden. In the middle, on a small hill, you see a gazebo.
ERIC: A gazebo? What color is it?
ED: (Pause) It's white, Eric.
ERIC: How far away is it?
ED: About 50 yards.
ERIC: How big is it?
ED: (Pause) It's about 30 ft across, 15 ft high, with a pointed top.
ERIC: I use my sword to detect good on it.
ED: It's not good, Eric. It's a gazebo.
ERIC: (Pause) I call out to it.
ED: It won't answer. It's a gazebo.
ERIC: (Pause) I sheathe my sword and draw my bow and arrows. Does it respond in any way?
ED: No, Eric, it's a gazebo!
ERIC: I shoot it with my bow (roll to hit). What happened?
ED: There is now a gazebo with an arrow sticking out of it.
ERIC: (Pause) Wasn't it wounded?
ED: OF COURSE NOT, ERIC! IT'S A GAZEBO!
ERIC: (Whimper) But that was a +3 arrow!
ED: It's a gazebo, Eric, a GAZEBO! If you really want to try to destroy it, you could try to chop it with an axe, I suppose, or you could try to burn it, but I don't know why anybody would even try. It's a @#$%!! gazebo!
ERIC: (Long pause. He has no axe or fire spells.) I run away.
ED: (Thoroughly frustrated) It's too late. You've awakened the gazebo. It catches you and eats you.
ERIC: (Reaching for his dice) Maybe I'll roll up a fire-using mage so I can avenge my Paladin.
At this point, the increasingly amused fellow party members restored a modicum of order by explaining to Eric what a gazebo is. Thus ends the tale of Eric and the Dread Gazebo. It could have been worse; at least the gazebo wasn't on a grassy gnoll.
The Fighter's Secret
My campaign had been running for about a year when I got back in touch with a good friend of mine. We had played D&D back in high school and I was excited to have him and his brother in my game.
Let's call him G, and his character was a Half - Orc Fighter named Vadim. G has a great russian accent so he decided to use that for his in character voice. So a Half Orc Russian Fighter, not the most original character but he's a great player.
Things were going well with the party finding a powerful artifact called the book of secrets. It was Ioun's own diary before she ascended, and it's said to contain every book in her own earthly library. However there is a cost to opening the book, you must tell the book a secret.
Every player goes around and tells a secret some are interesting but most are pretty simple. However then it was Vadim's turn. He calmly explained that before he joined with the party he met a young elf man, and the two of them had a relationship till things fell apart, and that Vadim still missed him.
It was a great secret, and G claims that it was an idea he had since creation. It was a remarkable reveal.
So have you ever had a reveal from a PC in your game? Did the DM know about it? Have you ever had these organic plot developments in your game?
TLDR: Russian Half-Orc Fighter comes out of the closet to unlock a young god's diary.
A much quicker reveal but still a satisfying one.
Ashes, the Noble Tiefling Draconic Sorcerer. I told the other players that I was playing a Tiefling Draconic Sorcerer, I just neglected to mention the Noble bit.
In the first session I didn't bring it up at all. Second session, Ashes started signing one thing, then crossed it out and signed 'Ashes.' One of the other party members rolled a Perception check and saw that the crossed out bit read 'Lady.' Everyone went 'ooooo.' Later, Ashes used a signet ring and scroll to gain access to the city morgue and some case files. Next session we were returning a child to the orphanage they had been living in and Ashes dressed in her almost dress uniform style finery. When Persuasion checks failed to get us into the orphanage, 'you would turn away a member of House Varanus?' got us in. Beginning of next session, Ashes revealed all at the insistence of the team Mum. Her full title is 'Lady Serena, Firstborn Scion of House Varanus, Heir to Castle Ashfall. Daughter of the Nine Hells and Oathbound of Prothidian the Everburning.'
Though I'd planned everything out in advance, it was still a hell of a lot of fun watching people piece together the truth.
I played a LE Warlock/Cleric in a primarily Good/Neutral party. While very dour and dark, I wasn't particularly open about my nature. It wasn't until we were in the presence of some nobility, and I gave a slight bow, that anyone started really putting it together. One of the party member's noticed a symbol of Mephistopheles on my neck, and started telling the others.
"You're evil! You've got an archdevil's symbol tattooed on your neck!"
"Yes, I am. But that's not a tattoo, it's a brand."
I honestly assumed everyone at the table would understand what that was and the implications behind it. Out of character, I had to explain what a brand was and its historical implications. After a 5-minute explanation, it killed the reveal that I was a slave. It wasn't the biggest reveal ever, but I had really put a lot of thought behind my character's background and most of it was never touched upon since most of the party wasn't that into RP, and the campaign fell through not long after.
I think you forgot Breaker of Chains, Mother of Dragons and Lord of the Dance.
Dang that sucks : T I always love weaving in a players backstory into the main plot.
Personally I don't think I'd let a player play an evil character. Not for this campaign I'm running anyways.
Fuck, that shit is cute as fuck, dude. I feel like I need to go punch a goblin just to feel manly again!
Now draw cute baby beholders.
EDIT: What books have you worked on? If it's okay to ask.
As for (released) books, you can find some of my work in Tomb of Annihilation (for example, little guy) and Xanathar's Guide to Everything.
Also baby beholders... would be amazing. :o
Hmm, well I take a lot of inspiration from existing creatures but it's a bit late so all I can think of right now is a sort of upside-down because they are smol, cute and gloopy which I feel are all necessary factors
You drew my favourite D&D creature!
I love you!
/r/DnD is trending today!
Behave yourselves boys and girls, and welcome our new visitors!
To all the visitors! Hello and welcome to DnD a subreddit dedicated to the wonderful game Dungeons and Dragons! If you have any questions about getting started feel free to ask! if you are starting from scratch our sidebar is a great place to begin! Be sure to check out our Getting Started Guide!
There is also a completely free PDF of the basic rules to get started right away with your friends! Check out the stickied comment by /u/Iamfivebears
We hope you enjoy your stay and may you ever roll nat 20's!
Here are some resources that anyone new to /sub/dnd should really appreciate, and anyone will gladily point to as good resources!
is a wonderful youtuber and writer for Turtle Rock Studios he posts a lot of videos about DnD on his channel, and has lots of good info for new and old players.
If you are interested in some actual play sessions a very popular one is Critical Role Run by some voice actors with Season 2 (the second campaign, and a great place to start!) starting Tonight! at 10pm Eastern 7pm Pacific!
I'd never do that! here are my stats btw:
STR: 17 DEX: 17 CON:17 INT:17 WIS:17 CHA:18
I'm also a human.
I'm cool with them as long as they don't fudge their rolls.
Dnd is trending? Why?
rolls sense motive
Critical role probably
[OC] I made a random character generator, and it can now generate over 5.2 million unique background stories
I recently wrote a random character generator as a weekend project and its now able to generate over 5,2 million unique background stories 😁 (or 1,9 billion unique characters, if you take race and class into the mix ;) )
If you want to give it a spin you can find it here www.NPCbase.com all kinds of feedback would be greatly appreciated, i really want to make this the best it can be :)
Some of the characters is has created:
A tiefling paladin who grew up in a nomadic hunter gatherer tribe, with more money than she could ever use, but can't utter a word to the opposite gender due to a crippling shyness and is not very good at dealing with it.
A elf monk who grew up as the sole heir to a vast family fortune, trying to prove to her self that she actually knew what she was doing with her life, but never knew her birth parents or where she comes from and boasts about it.
A gnome druid who grew up watching her mother desperately trying to hide her addiction, always attempting to be the strongest one in the group, but spends all her money on beer and has written a song about it.
Its definitely not perfect, but i hope to improve on it with time and once again, all feedback is greatly appreciated :).
A comb that summons a glowing orb for 1d3 rounds when you lick a person of higher status than you.
Ok, now I kinda want that.
That's not a magic item.
It's a brick of cocaine...
I can easily see some of my players (ok, one in particular) using this and licking random people with the justification of, "Just trying to find out where I fit in society."
A needle that makes you able to speak with animals, but they only speak a language you do not understand
Well that is useless.
The moment my players realized they weren’t playing a video game.
My current player group is fairly green, or at least they were when this happened. They were attempting to infiltrate a bandit camp on the side of a mountain. The bandits had built a large wall around their camp ( almost a semicircle ) but hadn’t put any towers incase of a siege. ( It was primarily built to keep zombies in the area out ).
The player decided to utilize their favorite tactic, Reckless Abandon, and rushed into the camp. They were soon met by three of the bandits with two of them drawing weapons and the third beginning to cast a ritual of some kind.
In a moment of supreme video game logic the party then fell back to the entrance of the camp and then attempted to hide behind the walls. My players then talked about how their plan was to wait for the bandits to run out and then ambush them. After a few moments of me not saying anything, they quickly realized that the bandits had no reason to run out after them and they sheepishly ran back into the camp.
They were then met by a fire elemental a bandit had just finished summoning.
After the battle the players all face palmed at how stupid they were, this wasn’t Skyrim.
Edit : Thanks guys for so many comments and upvotes. I've posted a couple times here before and it's felt pretty amazing talking to all of you. I know it's just internet points but it did mean a lot to me. So thank you all so much.
"The bandit AI is too OP, pls nerf."
My party had a similar but opposite experience. They came upon a town and recognized a couple enemy guards on the road outside. The ranger shot an arrow at them. The guards response was to blow a horn and retreat into the town.
The players gave chase and were greeted in the town square by 20 more enemies.
That's awesome. Just wait until someone casts a spell and you turn to another player and go "how close are you?". The reaction of "What do you mean friendly fire counts when they launch a spell?! I take HOW much damage?!" is always funny.
Yeah that sounds like my players XD
Thankfully they picked up an old friend of mine and he's much more focused on tactics. So they're getting better slowly but surely.
My new year's resolution: Sculpting the entire Monster Manual out of clay in 2018. Progress report of week 1!
It's Foon, you may have seen the Shambling Mound I created and posted on this subreddit a few days ago.
I was (and still am!) completely blown away by the overwhelming amount of positive responses. A lot of you said you'd like to see more of what I make, so I'm happy to announce the new year's resolution I jokingly talked to my DM about at first... But now, not in the least due to your support, I'm actually planning on executing:
Throughout 2018, I want to sculpt the entire Monster Manual out of clay!
Considering there are a bunch of categories where making every stat block would be a bit much (for example, making a wyrmling/young/adult/ancient dragon in every single colour), I've decided to make at least one mini from everything that's listed on the Content page. If I counted correctly, that's 153 listings - or in other words, 51 weeks of 3 new creations each!
I got a bit overly excited about the idea, and I'm ahead of schedule for this week - without further ado, let me present:
Animated Objects - Rug of Smothering
Oozes - Ochre Jelly
And as a bonus, I'd like to share my little fire dragon I've made a while ago. . :3
See you guys next week! :D
If there's any monster you'd like to see me make next, feel free to tell me! I am not promising anything, for some monsters I'll need different tools/materials/skills, but mostly I just decide in the moment what I'll be making that day, so I can try to take it into account :D
These are really high quality, but I have a feeling that making the humanoid targets (like Bandit Captains and whatnot) will be more difficult. Your monsters are amazing, though.
Oh yes, definitely. That's one of the reasons I started with the non-humanoids.. For now, I'm pushing the humanoids to later in the year, so I have some time to develop my skills first!
You could make some serious money opening an etsy store with these things. I have a friend who loves the grick and I would certainly consider buying one for a present
I had a little monster
I made it out of clay
And when it's dry and ready
Adventurers I will slay
Thanks so much! I was honestly a little worried about sharing it because so much D&D art you see is grungy and realistic or has that traditional, high fantasy appeal.
I'm actually a children's illustrator so my work is very different from that haha
I am pretty much in love with both the character and the style. This is amazing.
I wanted to share this character with you all - I did this just for some fun and it ended up getting a lot of interest from people over on twitter and instagram, I've even had a few commission inquiries from people who want me to draw their characters which is awesome!
It's not your typical, semi-realistic D&D style so I'd be interested in hearing what you guys think : )
No no, this is waaaaaaaaaaaaay more my aesthetic. I would have that type of artwork on my wall.
Proud of my 10yo: her PC charges into a bad situation, because she's role playing
I've got to say, my daughter kind of surprised me with how well she role played her high intelligence, low-ish wisdom elf wizard last session. The party (all younger kids) are a group of four 5th level adventurers. They just cut down a hill giant, when a group of six bugbears show up.
When I start to describe the creatures, my daughter asks, "Our PCs have seen these before right?" Me: "Yes you have. They are bugbears. And they look angry." "So they are goblinoid?" she says excitedly Me: "Yes, as a matter of fact they are." "I charge at them!" she emphatically exclaims
Here I am screaming to myself: WTF, you are a wizard! You will get stomped if you melee. But I keep my opinion to myself.
Me: "Okay." "I pull out the Goblin Stopper [magic sword] and swing at the closest one!" she can barely hold in her joy.
Only then do I realize the method to her madness: I had forgotten that about five months ago, I had given the party a weak magic short sword that urges (not forces) its attuned owner to use it in battle when enemy goblinoids are near.
Proud papa. [sheds tear]
Her quick-thinking little sister has her gnome druid cast Conjure Animals to help wizard friend out of her immediate predicament. The wizard takes some damage, but lives to see another day. What a fun few minutes that was.
Next on the agenda: give her shoes that urge her to make good grades.
I would buy her a replica plastic sword as a trophy first, then tried the Goodie Two-Shoes.
I feel a dollar store trip in my near future.
Ha, yes. Thankfully, she does not need any help in the grade department.