Went for a bicycle ride date with a single mother and her kid. Didn't realize I had an wardrobe malfunction until this happened...

Went for a bicycle ride date with a single mother and her kid. Didn't realize I had an wardrobe malfunction until this happened...

and now you're on a list somewhere

But it was an accident! I had a wardrobe malfunction! I know it's not an wardrobe malfunction! I hope the Grammar Nazis will forgive me!!

...oh wait, you're not talking about that list are you?

What a load of rubbish. Worst lie on reddit.

How short are your shorts that your nuts drop out, unnoticed (by you).

Edit: Or should I ask... Do your balls hang low???

Glad someone said it. As a guy, you know when your balls are out where they shouldn’t be.

The question you should be asking is how low do his balls dangle

"Your future siblings"

Well, that takes balls.

Do your balls hang low? Do they wobble to and fro? Can you tie 'em in a knot? Can you tie 'em in a bow? Can you throw 'em over your shoulder like a continental soldier? Do your balls hang low?

Edited for missing lyric. Op needs to make sure they are correct for when he teaches it to the 3 year old

Oh my! My dick was just hanging outside my zipper all day today while I was at Kroger. Oh dear. Oopsie!

Man, you really went with the low hanging fruit on this one.

Good thing this didn't actually happen.

Who wears short shorts.....

Omg....the same thing happened to me except it was my whole penis...schlong AND balls and somehow my weiner fell right into a hotdog bun the kid was holding! Crazy right!?!? Yea, I don't believe you. /sub/quityourbullshit

HE wears short shorts!

I'm sorry your grandma's balls hung so low. Condolences to you and your family

And it's not something you'd even want to lie about.

To be true either OP has a nutsack down to his knees like Johnny Knoxville in Bad Grandpa or he purposely let his sack hang out cause he's a pedo.

"Whoopsies my scrotum just flopped out accidentally. Oh my teee hee don't touch it 🤗."

He knew

DEEZ NUTZ

http://i1240.photobucket.com/albums/gg484/rawbaws/images%205_zpstsktv7do.jpg

Naaaa dude.

It's only a wardrobe malfunction if the article of clothing actually malfunctions (breaks).

If you're wearing your clothes normally and you're nuts drop out due to activity, that's on you dog lol.

I'm not going Krogering with you.

Back in the day, as they say, i brought my then girlfriend to meet my uncle and his wife at their house. He had just come in from doing something outside and was wearing shorts, as it was pretty hot that day.

So we sit across each other in his living room and start having conversation. He then decides to cross his legs and his entire cock and balls just presents themselves to us, unobstructed. And they were there. The entire time he stayed in the position. Dick and balls. On display.

Oh fucking Christ.

Really bad flashbacks. As a child my parents made me and my siblings and cousins sing this bullshit for my grandmas birthday.

That was my grandmas thing. Embarrass the ever living hell out of her family.

Hopefully the kid left his balls.

Oh, he knew.

My husband went out last weekend with the back of his shorts blown out and didn't realize it because he had gone commando and just thought the nice breeze was from that and not from his ass hanging out.

It would have been nuts not to.

In which case he would have felt the edge of the tear.

Testicles are very sensitive. It's super unbelievable that someone could fuck up that bad and have no idea.

Like a continental soldier.

Edit: I see below you said you googled the lyrics. I always heard/sang this line directly after shoulder. Also I said sling instead of throw.

Nair your balls for short shorts

You'll probably go to court court!

Debatable. Uncle once walked past in briefs: balls hanging to one side. Didn't realise & was too awkward to tell him.

Edit: TIL my uncle knew.

“And definitely do not suck on it”.

Was it anything like this?

? Skip to 1:42 if you're short on time.

He knew. Did he establish dominance?

Risky click...was risky this time.

Thank you. That's very kind of you.

You're right. That sort of thing happens all the time.

When I learned that song that line was, "Like a continental soldier".

And that penis's name? Albert Einstein

Hardly, that jpeg acts as censorship.

Nsfw

dates 3 year old

Bro...

And did the mother make a similar action later?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RMFD8zL7Efs

NSFW tits and song related

https://vimeo.com/184206731

edit: added a youtubelink

I suppose it could be true. If he was wearing bike shorts it is common to go commando, and the seam may have ripped.

His balls were supposedly hanging out of his shorts, and he didn't notice.

How? Calling false or deliberation.

If you dare wear short shorts...

She was just checking the time.

No way you wouldn't notice your balls flopping about.

Want to meet up for kisses?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHxfMn9XM6o

She probably said something like "put the mouse back in the house, buddy. This is a family place". Then she went back to serving coffee in the old friends episode OP was watching.