UK: Porn websites are told to prove their users are at least 18 or face fines of £250,000 as part of a new crackdown

UK: Porn websites are told to prove their users are at least 18 or face fines of £250,000 as part...

This is of course the Uk's number one problem, not the economy, not Brexit, not war(s), not Russia, not terrorism, not China, not NATO, not Trump, teenagers looking at boobies on the Internet.

Anyone who votes for May and her party of hypocritical assholes (yeah, let's see some MP browser caches who vote for this sort of shit) are worse than idiots.

Do you actually want to live in a world where teenage boys can't masturbate? You think the fuckers are annoying now.

Wait, so people actually lie on that 'above 18' box? I'm truly shocked.

I never lied, it always asked "Are you over 18?" It never specified years, so I answered in terms of days.

The whole point of this is to distract public from bigger issues.

That's one way to ensure every single household and mobile users get a VPN.

VPN providers must be ecstatic and explode in usage in Europe!

All this really means is that we'll have to use a VPN to access porn so they'll have a harder job keeping track of the increased number of people using VPNs when it comes to spying on them to 'stop terrorism'.

What a fucking brilliant law.

It is understood porn site users will have to provide details from their credit card, which cannot be legally issued to anyone under 18. Gambling websites use the same system of verification.

Oh I bet everybody just dreams about giving porn sites their personal information. By the way, I personally don't own a credit card! I would be forced to acquire one just to watch porn? That would mean additional costs. Debit card won't suffice?

By the way, for example in Poland it is legal to show porn to people above 15 years, but porn sites still ask if the viewer is 18 or older.

So I have family in China and the last time I visited, my cousin emailed me beforehand and asked if I could bring him some porn. Weird request, but we're close, so whatever. I buy a cheap external hard drive, load it with his particular interests and bring it with me when I visit.

So we do the handoff and he's low-key excited, just incredibly giddy. I'm a little concerned on the other hand, so I ask him if it weren't for me, how would he access it? He says he usually uses a VPN, or did initially, but his dad's in the Communist party (for business reasons) and there'd be a chance that it could be used as blackmail if someone looked into their search history. So I ask him what he does now. He says, we can go if you want to see. I have a morbid curiosity, so we leave the house and take a thirty minute walk to a nearby shopping arcade.

The area's pretty much what you'd expect: just little shops selling mostly cookware, house accessories, old women clothes, that kind of thing. We walk through it, he says hello to a few shop owners who ask how his mom's doing, and then we walk into a textbook shop.

The shop's quiet. It's a holiday for school kids, so nobody wants to think about needing new study guides. My cousin checks to see if the coast is clear and we approach the cashier. The owner's thin, kind of wispy. He has on a not-so-white wifebeater with the bottom tucked into the collar, exposing his midriff to beat the summer heat. There's a little TV in the corner and he's watching some kind of variety show. He continues to watch it as he talks to us.

Owner: "It's been a while. How've you been?"

Cousin: "Good. It's too hot, though."

Owner: "Yeah. Who's he?"

Cousin: "My cousin."

Owner: "He's handsome. Why aren't you that handsome?"

Cousin: "Fuck off."

Owner: "So what do you guys want?"

Cousin: "Just browsing. Just want to look at a couple of things."

Owner: "Textbooks? Well, aren't you just the model student."

Cousin: "The other stuff."

Owner: "What other stuff?"

Cousin: "The stuff you keep in the back."

Owner: "Hey, what kind of business do you think I run?"

Cousin: "Don't give me that bullshit and stop embarrassing me in front my cousin. He's American, you know."

The owner sighs and shakes his head.

Owner: "Whatever."

The owner gets up and switches off the TV, then motions for us to follow. We go through the back office and into what looks like a closet. The inside is dark, except for a little kid about twelve, illuminated by a computer monitor as he plays Warcraft. The owner turns on the light and tells the kid to get out. The kid tells him he's in the middle of the quest, to which the owner says, we have customers, go man the front desk, you can play later. The kid sighs, signs out, and gives us the room.

When he leaves, the owner pulls back these curtains lining the walls, revealing bookshelves and bookshelves of bootleg porn. Poorly printed cardboard covers wrapped in cellophane stretch from corner to corner. The owner locks the door and tell us we can check it out.

There's a few things I recognize: Brazzers, Lisa Ann, a few Japanese actresses I've seen before. I walk around the room, scanning some of the titles. I get to one of the shelves and the owner says, "Those aren't for sale, those are special requests. You can check it out if you want, though."

A shitton of them are gross. Just nasty people doing nasty things with each other using nasty things. Well, who am I to judge. Then I see it at the bottom, this entire section in pink. I kneel down to get a closer look and they're all titles that say something like 'Pretend so-and-so is your girlfriend!' or 'The perfect date with your girlfriend!' And that was when I was most surprised. Some guy out there went through the trouble of finding a contact, mustering up the courage to talk to a black market porn bootlegger, to get the cutesiest porn imaginable, to which the sex is probably not even his primary focus. Right then I felt detached from just about everything.

We left shortly after, my cousin picking out a few titles that caught his eye. I didn't buy anything, thinking it'd be annoying to bring back and they were probably VCD titles, so that's just a hassle I didn't need to deal with. I talked with my cousin a few months after and it turns out that he sold the contents of the hard drive to the owner and bought his mom a nice birthday present.

Holy fucking shit. The UK is literally going to legally require people to do the main thing you do not do on porn sites so you don't risk people stealing your credit card.

Watching porn before you're even a month old? You'll be the world champion arm wrestler by the time you hit highschool.

They're pretty much forcing teens to jack off exclusively to hentai at this point.

On Steam you get the question asking for your birthday all the time, since certain games are rated for adults or whatever and it never remembers your answer. It defaults to like 1/1/1972 or something.

Valve must be baffled that 90% of their user base was born on January 1st. What a tremendous coincidence.

Men that are 18 years and 0 days old can be sent to war, but boys that are 17 years and 364 days old absolutely should not be allowed to look at boobies on the Internet

LMAO. Nothing hypocritical about that whatsoever

ask china

Some of us dutifully enter our entire birthday each time. Don't ask why, we're not really sure ourselves...

Joke on them, Hentai has some really fucked up shits.

In the UK you can join the army at 16 and be on the frontlines at 17 (although they try to avoid having 17 year olds on the front). So in the UK you can get married at 16 and join the army and play with guns but heavens forbid you see porn. Having sex is ok at 16 just dont watch it.

This is why I downloaded all porn. I was so ready for this!

This is a slippery slope to total censorship. First you need ID for porn. Then for everything that is not mainstream media. Notice how they target porn first before targeting sites with violent content. Porn is a lot less offensive than violence.

last time i saw a video about china it was teenage boys beating up some guy for gang initiation.

give china porn i say.

Okay but why the hell is this happening before the same kind of regulations take effect on alcohol? Porn is just part of the natural discovery of ones own sexuality, and I actually think that it could potentially even be damaging to completely bar that kind of thing from teenagers going through/having gone through puberty.

Meanwhile you can buy alcohol on sites like amazon or the many specialist alcohol distribution sites simply by checking a box to confirm you're eighteen, and it'll be delivered no questions asked.

Alcohol can kill in the short term and cause health problems in the long term, and yet we're doing almost nothing to address the fact that a teenager could easily steal their parents credit card and buy some alcohol online, and by the time the parents work it out - if they even do - that teenager might have received three bottles of Jack Daniels and gone on an all night bender and wound up dead in a ditch.

If we're going to be cracking down on age restrictions relating to anything we really have to be prioritising things that pose an actual threat to individuals - especially teenagers - rather than something that, at worst, is just a child growing up and learning about themselves and their bodies.

"Damage: Experts say online pornography warps children's views of relationships"

So do romantic comedies, seems to work on adults too.

Why not start a war instead? That usually works.

They probably thought a war on porn would be cheaper and easier.

And then we end up with VPN's being made illegal perhaps?

That's a vastly different experience from what I went through in a 6 month exchange at Peking University.

Most kids in China know how to play with vpns and watching porn isn't as difficult as most people would think. It's one of those blind eye laws, as long as you're not mass producing porn and distributing it, the government couldn't care less.

What the fuck is happening to UK. I always held UK in high esteem as a country. But these days? Well not so much to say the least, when talking about their government. It made me appretiate being in the EU even more.

Get a hyper deluxe VPN to hide the VPN.

Actually GabeN made a comment a few years ago about this. It's pretty funny.

https://linustechtips.com/main/topic/83148-93-of-steam-userbase-born-1st-of-january/

Maybe people will get together and create a massive archive of pictures of fake or expired credit cards that everyone can use. It depends on how this would be implemented, of course.

Yeah, my cousin was probably needlessly paranoid. His dad's in the restaurant business and made a few enemies out of competitors, so he was always told to act squeaky clean to avoid blackmail. I'm assuming the other customers were probably older people who weren't so tech-savvy.

The Conservative Party happened.

They'll just make VPN illegal.

even better

The UK fucked themselves so badly by electing these scumbag Tories.

And the game of whack-a-mole begins.

Sharia May hates the UK

Canadian here. I'm ready for the pornolocost.

Time Fapsules

FTFY

I hereby invite Teresa May into my home to watch me jackin it. It's clearly what she wants to see.

It pisses me right off. I remember the internet from the '90s when porn sites demanded your credit card details to prove you were over 18 and the amount of credit card fraud that took place as a result.

But how can they give such huge fines to companies not in the UK? I bet pornhub which server is not in the UK wont face this or brazzers. How can they even think this will so anything?

Because it's part of a sociopolitical identity and therefore morally essential (except for them, of course - they don't say hypocrisy is a crime).

That it gets into dangerous territory in terms of surveillance and free speech is immaterial (if anything it's a nice plus because it sets a precedent for more of this kind of thing).

Aside, frankly, while extremes can certainly be misleading or damaging, this is the opposite direction an enlightened society should be ,moving. Demonizing the body or sex is not healthy in terms of the education and health of individuals or society as a whole. Rather than masturbating to their political control over others and acting to preserve titillation, the people responsible might do better to consider seeking therapy, or at least retiring.

Don't forget to leave usb drives loaded with that porn in bushes for the next generation of young teens to find.

UK: Parliamentarians are told to prove their IQ is at least 18 or face fines of £250,000 as part of a new crackdown

I hope it does. Unacceptable to regulate the internet like this, porn in the UK and social media in Germany, no sites will dare having open the sites there risking the fines.

Politicians are fucking retarded.

I've been with my mobile phone provider for about 8 years, the other day I looked at some porn in the morning, then that night was going to some forum and they said it was for adults only, asked me to send a photo of my passport or driving license to prove I'm 18+ (my phone provider, not the forum). Just laughed and turned windscribe on.

GiffGaff for anyone curious.

Old people. They've got nothing better to do on voting days.

Yeah, that's our biggest issue right now. Not brexit, not terrorism / extremism, not a myriad of sacrificial pyres we call "towers".

Gotta tackle porn.

They have to use the TOR browser for their porn, so no cache at all.

Are they are still training with guns and explosives at 16 or 17 ?

Make your own

If this will be enforced the UK will end up with 3-4 major pornosites that are trustworthy.

Next step is forcing those sites to only show government sanctioned porno. Kisses on the cheek, a naked ankle, and a flirtatious wink.

Just geolocate the IP and tell the user "sorry, you can't have your porn since you're from the UK."

I feel the exact same and I fucking live here.

It's not that strange, either you are born on January 1st or you're not, 2 options, fifty fifty chance.

Back to looking at bra ads I guess...

"Please re-enter your penis size in inches."

A VPN cloaker to hide your VPN.

I want to see mass Theresa May cum tributes on pornhub.

You can't be deployed until you're 18, stop spreading bullshit. One or two 17 year olds got deployed to Afghan by mistake but thats entirely the mistake of their command, and themselves.

Do you want to turn nerds into terrorist? Because that's how you turn nerds into terrorists.

How exactly do you go about "making your own", it's not something you can do using only your home machine.

Ironically, this would be completely unenforceable without at least European-wide collaboration. VPNs will reroute immediately at the first whiff of government bullshit and guess what - they won't be in the UK. One could even partner up and make a VPN app, giving premium access to specific websites.

Their shit law will never work - if there are ways to download it, there will be ways to stream it too.

Girlfriend RP is a major genre of porn in the US too, it's just mainly through camgirl sites/clips.

Who is voting for them? Is the UK full of people who think they're millionaires but just down on their luck at the moment?

It's a little bit awkward when people are watching you game on the same screen and the prompt comes up.

A momentary hesitation. The merriment of social gaming quiets, and you punch in the dates of the truth. No words are said but everyone understands.

Presumably you'll have to make an account that will be verified (and likely associated with) with your ID is just a fucking awful idea. Never mind the censorship aspect, if that shit leaked everyone's fucked.

Lol this should get interesting.

Glad to see all of the Uks problems are solved though.

Only the porn websites are in hot water. The viewers are too difficult to track down. Nobody wins in this situation.

Yes, this is a perfect example of regulatory capture. Big porn want these laws. Making all their visitors to enter their credit cards would definitely increase the number of paying customers.

Theresa May is quite a strong Christian, iirc her father is some sort of thing in the C of E.

That, and it'll appeal to one of their core demographics which is the elderly (absolutely the best people for deciding the future of a country, obviously).

That's fucking priceless. Incredibly relevant, thank you for the share.

Do you want teens to steal their parents' credit card information? Because this is how you get teens to steal their parents' credit card information.

Big Sister May Is Watching You

I've been alive for 18 nanoseconds. Time to get down on some teen girl-on-girl action.

be the change you want to see in the world.

A significant clutch of old people who are against anything progressive, the 'rich', the psuedo-rich and those amongst the middle/working classes who buy into lies such as austerity.

I can just imagine some poor cop having to go to somebody's house and tell them, "I need to arrest you for letting your teenager jerking off to porn and your teenager for actually doing it." Just imagine THAT car ride. Talk about the most un-enforceable and stupid law ever...

Better yet, a cop going to an ISP and telling them

Cop: "you're getting a fine for letting teenagers watch porn".

ISP: How do you know teenagers are watching porn?

Cop: "We have witnesses and videos that we can present to the judge."

ISP: "So...in order to prevent teenagers from watching porn, you decided to film them 'watching' porn?"

lol that's a sure fire way to instigate riot in UK I'm sure.

"Sure, this is my driver's license and not my Dad's or a picture I grabbed from the web at all"

why is the birthrate falling? why are young men and young women ignoring each other? who keeps stealing octopuses from the aquarium? where have the recent surge of half man, half octopi come from?

how are police dealing with the recent surge of "mega-hyper-omega-final-form" rape crimes?

Is this the end of that glorious word "wanker" in England?

Imagine how many people are gonna get their credit cards scammed now they are expected to give out their credit card info to every dodgey website with adult content on it.

Good luck, the mention of her name is enough to make my outy an iny

The UK have always been prudish about nudity compared to continental Europe. Of course the most prudish ones left and moved to North America - helping explain why in the US you get a more restrictive movie rating if you show a boob than if you shoot it off.

Do they want rioting.

Because this is how you get rioting.

Why does the UK have such a hard-on for regulating porn?

As the world should be.

And yet many of my Chinese friends are still using VPNs with ease.

After reading all that, I am really quite glad that it didn't end with the Loch Ness Monster.

Tumblr hosts some good enough porn

But how will you cloak the cloaker? Easy, with a VPN Parka.

What.

The internet has been fine for the past 17 years. Is this really an issue they need to crack down on? They can't just leave it as a grey area?

For the record, I looked at porn when I was 13. I watched "Angel of Darkness", a tentacle rape hentai OVA, when I was 14. I also saw my mom's hairy vagina when I was born, and I even sucked on her tits when I was 1. Big deal. I turned out fine. And so did millions of others. They even make a joke about watching uncensored porn in the very first volume of the Yu-Gi-Oh manga, and that's something I read in elementary school. Teenagers with an internet connection look at porn. It's just an unspoken rule of the 21st century. I can't believe this is some revelation for UK politicians in 2017, as if it were some surprising news they haven't heard of before.

If anything, we should just do away with the arbitrary age verification in the first place. Teenagers are on rule 34 phaeal sharing rule 34 of Theresa May's titties, and they're going to turn out to be respectable adults just fine.

Pornoclasm

They'll just force Service providers to ban all pornhub links.

All this means that while we can enjoy the freedom of the web, the UK will have the most robust internet child protection measures of any country in the world

Yeah, us and China. Just give it a couple more years tops.

TLDR the chinese fap to feelings...

W

T

F

It worked when I was 12. Desperate times....

Or that it was one long, elaborate ruse by shittymorph to distract us from the fact that in 1998 the undertaker threw Mankind off hell in the cell, plummeting 18 16 feet through the announcer's table.

It's not. The article doesn't mention any of that.

That's right, honey. You were conceived by your father and 19 other Japanese men jerking off on to mommy's face.