Dr Phil with the words of wisdom

Dr Phil with the words of wisdom

Don't be a squire... cum on her plans to reforge the Ottoman empire

Sundresses are absolutely a guys weakness.

Good luck lads

Dont be a dummy... Cum on her tummy!

Don't be thick... cum on her dick

Don't be a nut...cum in her butt

They're cute as hell and easy access!

How exactly does one get pussy while living at the white house as a teenage boy? The secret service always cock blocking you. when you're trying to run game on some foreign prime ministers daughter the news media catches you smiling at her and immediately blows shit out if proportion speculating that you are somehow breaking international law with your awkward teenage flirting, so you have to testify before congress that you didn't give away any top secret documents to her and are made to admit live on C-SPAN that you've never even kissed a girl . Then you get blue balls from some hot conservative girl winking at you and flashing her panties under her skirt and making sexy faces and blow job motions to you while you were going through some airport or public event, and when you passed by and shook her hand she leans in whispering she is going to diddle her clit thinking about you tonight and how much she wants to suck your dick off, just to fuck with you. Then you try to look up some porn when you get home just to relieve the tension but you just know the CIA is monitoring and 3 other govornment agencies are watching you beat off. Then you finally break down and Jack off in the shower which sets off some fucking biohazard drain alarm and the entire place is on lock down until they can find the source of the specimen and you end up getting debriefed by the joint chiefs of staff about your masturbatory habits and how you almost created a national security issue with your dick. Then wikileaks leaks your search history showing you looked up penis enlargement techniques when it was actually just some click bait you'd accidentally clicked and TYT spends all next week talking about your supposed micro penis. So you end up squirming a little since you are so wound up and being judged constantly and now people are saying you look like a fucking mental patient and you start to think you'll never get any pussy.

Oh no, you're already failing brother... STAY STRONG!

People watermark fake tweets by other people now? What a world we live in  

EDIT: I'm a content creator

People watermark fake tweets by other people now? What a world we live in

EDIT:

Bust on her mound, Anakin, I have the high ground.

Ok where can I find these $10 sundresses???

Currently wearing a $50 sundress and it’s by far one of the cheapest.

Please give a shit... cum in her armpit.

Send it down the hatch, not in the snatch.

Same

“Stay strong” ??? All you have to do is stick a fucking condom on

Only fools don't wrap their tools.

What a world indeed

💭Does that mean that the child support would be 5x?

So...how you doin?

Ohhh, look at Ghandi over here, paying attention to LaBoR pRaCtIcEs

The problem is how easily they convert to a belt. Design flaw!

The problem is I see the girls go by dressed in their Summer clothes. I have to turn away before my darkness goes.

What the hell did I just read

You mean handles

I'm transitioning just so I can wear sundresses in public

also because I might die if I don't

I don’t take advice from fake doctors.

Greetings, everyone. I am new. (One second – let me get this spork out of the way.) My name is Katy, but you can call me the Penguin of Doom. (I’m laughing aloud.) As you can plainly see, my actions have no pattern whatsoever. That is why I have come here. To meet similarly patternless individuals, such as myself.

I am 13 – mature for my age, however! – and I enjoy watching Invader Zim with my girlfriend. (I am bisexual. Please approach this subject maturely.) It is our favorite television show, as it adequately displays stochastic manners of behavior such as we possess.

She behaves without order – of course – but I wish to meet more individuals of her and my kind. As the saying goes, “the more, the merrier.”

Ah, it is to laugh. Anyway, I hope to make many friends here, so please comment freely.

Doom!

That is simply one of many examples of my random actions. Ha, ha. Fare thee well. I wish you much love and waffles.

Yours,

The Penguin of Doom.

Or just bust on those sweater puppies

Wow. That was quite a ride.

You mean currently pregnant because someone failed at the pullout method lmao

If you don't mind the labor practices there's places like Forever 21.

Currently pregnant from the pullout method, this does NOT work

If you run really fast, child support won't catch you.

Just convince yourself there is no ethical consumption under capitalism and then you can buy anything guilt-free.

hi every1 im new!!!!!!! holds up spork my name is katy but u can call me t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m!!!!!!!! lol…as u can see im very random!!!! thats why i came here, 2 meet random ppl like me _… im 13 years old (im mature 4 my age tho!!) i like 2 watch invader zim w/ my girlfreind (im bi if u dont like it deal w/it) its our favorite tv show!!! bcuz its SOOOO random!!!! shes random 2 of course but i want 2 meet more random ppl =) like they say the more the merrier!!!! lol…neways i hope 2 make alot of freinds here so give me lots of commentses!!!! DOOOOOMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <--- me bein random again _^ hehe…toodles!!!!!

love and waffles,

t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m

something about doing it with her wearing the dress... just damn its even hotter.

STAY STRONG!

I can tell you are a brother slipping into the darkness. The first step to recovery is admitting sundresses have control over our lives and that we are powerless.

Guys dribble before they shoot. Don't be a fool, wrap your tool. Stay safe homie.

He's old. $10 to him is $25 today.

https://www.oldnavy.com/products/sun-dresses.jsp

I'm getting old as well, I bitch about how much everything costs. $7 for a couple of candy bars and sodas at the convenience store is insane. Just like my grandparents saying they bought Hershey bars for 5 cents as a kid. They were 25 cents when I was a kid.

If the child doesn't arrive in 15 minutes you're legally allowed to leave.

wtssta DAMIT she's pregnant

Barron Trump, The Expert

"Here's a dollar. Go see a star war."

Well this is a fake tweet from a fake doctor

I hope you remembered to floss.

Good luck, adorable friend

The script for Corey in the house.

Don’t be a punk, make her swallow your spunk! (With consent obviously)

I already fucked up, baby due in August. I gotta try to not fuck up AGAIN afterwards

Have a care, nut in her hair.

first world leader problems

What we were taught was that it's possible for precum to have stray semen in it, especially if a previous ejaculation occurred, the precum can push out the semen therefore rendering the pullout method not 100% effective. As far as I can tell this is still and always has been the case.

GREETINGS BATTLE BROTHERS I AM NEW. HOLDS UP BOLTER MY NAME IS SERGEANT ARGUS BUT YOU CAN CALL ME BATTLE BROTHER. AS YOU CAN SEE I AM VERY LOYAL TO THE EMPEROR. THAT IS WHY I HAVE COME HERE, TO MEET OTHER BATTLE BROTHERS WHO ARE LOYAL TO THE EMPEROR LIKE MYSELF. I AM 127 YEARS OF AGE ( PRAISE THE EMPEROR) I LIKE TO PURGE HERETICS AND XENO SCUM WITH MY BATTLE BROTHERS ( I LOVE MY BATTLE BROTHERS, IF YOU DO NOT LIKE THAT THEN DEAL WITH IT) IT IS OUR FAVORITE ACTIVITY BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT LOYAL TO THE EMPEROR. ALL MY BATTLE BROTHERS ARE LOYAL TO THE EMPEROR TOO OF COURSE, BUT I WANT TO MEET MORE LOYAL SERVANTS OF THE EMPEROR. LIKE THE EMPEROR ONCE SAID, THE MORE THE MERRIER. I HOPE TO BOND WITH A LARGE AMOUNT OF LOYAL SERVANTS OF THE EMPEROR SO JOIN ME IN PRAISE OF THE EMPEROR. FAREWELL.

PRAISE THE EMPEROR

BATTLE BROTHER

/sub/wtsstadamit

It always makee me so angry when I see these watermarks. Ugh.

I have a red door and I paint it black,

I’m wondering what sundress cost $10 lol

I'm doing it for the rompers (if any can fit my 6'5" body)

if Gwendoline Christie can look amazing at 6' 3" that just means you have 2 more inches of gorgeousness to fit into those rompers

that is a nice watermark.

Be a dear, cum in her ear.

For the fabrics lol....its okay I really thought my puppy went to live on a farm.

Enjoy where it’s from, drink your own cum

they cost 10$ because there is NOTHING underneath

This is going to be my new go-to pasta

I prefer flats.

One does not merely bust into Mordor, cum in her back door.

Even if she’s a catch, don’t cum in her snatch.

Freeze some samples and then get clipped. That’s what I did and there are zero accidents. If I change my mind we can just go get one of my samples.

Sorta sounds like it's your fault.

He is doing just fine without you leering at him.

You're shooting blanks bro.

What? How? What?. . .

Guys dribble before they shoot.

That's genius. Stealing that one 💦💦💥

Ardene's has cheap sundresses so they're thin enough to let the sunlight in through it ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Also Amazon is always good/thrift stores too.

Take one in the fanny, save money on the nanny.

And if she’s late, throw her off of Hell in a Cell like it’s nineteen ninety-eight.

CAREFUL, NED CARFEUL

Cheese on a board these hoes are.

The parenthetical makes this the classiest post of them all.

Me too

Don’t be a fool...cum in her pool

Not in her hobbit hole, on top of her grassy knoll.

That subreddit went to shit after I quit moderating it on my old account.

99% of the posts are sheer, not transparent from sun. It's a bunch of bullshit, and the users don't care.

I do that already except I assume there is no unethical consumption

Nope. Libido the same, same size loads... for lack of a better term, and all the sensation is the same.

Added bonus: done in 15 minutes, didn’t feel a thing, minimal soreness and bruising after. At least in my case.

Worst part: Doctor didn’t want me to unload for 12 days.

I made 8.

I used to work at Old Navy and we always had a bunch of not-so-fancy sundresses in the back for like, 25 cents to 5 dollars. In the winter just ask if they have any back-stocked sundresses. I once sold like seven to some dude who wanted to break them down for their fabrics.

I accidentally clicked your username. I think you have a lot of weaknesses my dude.

Precum does not now nor has it ever contained sperm. I think sex ed got better since you took it.

Edit: edited semen to sperm

Username checks out.

What is this? I've been seeing people say stuff like this lately. Are they not teaching kids about pre-cum in sex-ed anymore?

Fine then.

Dont be a prick, Cover your dick!

It's kind of sad/troubling that so many dudes think the pullout method is effective enough to be considered birth control.

If you do not wish to be a father, make sure you use adequate protection when having sexual intercourse with a member of the opposite sex

He was right your very good at cyber

Use protection so she don't have to have C-Section

Delicious but ultimately bad for your heart.

English folk need ignore this advice

Oh man when the sundress gets stuck between her cheeks

😩🍆💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦

Don't be an idiot by cumming in her clitoris

Pull out quick on them hoes wearing bogos